


Chainsmoking Your Love

by theBastardArc77



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:00:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 31,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23225179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theBastardArc77/pseuds/theBastardArc77
Summary: Lincoln Loud was viewed by many to be a strong, caring, and kind person. He had suffered through so much, Sister Fight Protocol, Bad Luck, everything that was thrown at him, Lincoln could handle. Or so people thought. Lincoln Loud now must battle the greatest enemy of all. Depression.
Relationships: Lincoln Loud/Margo, Lincoln Loud/Tabby, Lincoln Loud/thicc QT
Comments: 9
Kudos: 30





	1. who am I?

Lincoln Loud woke up to the sound of his alarm. Lincoln Loud got up and turned it off before changing out of his PJs. Lincoln Loud left his room and saw that there was no line for the bathroom. Lincoln Loud expected this as he set his alarm to go off at 6:30. Lincoln loud put on his black hoodie and headed to the bathroom. Lincoln loud turned on the bathroom lights and unzipped his pants before pissing in the toilet bowl. Lincoln Loud finished peeing and zipped his pants up and then looked at himself in the mirror.

"Who are you?" Lincoln asked the reflection "Your not Lincoln Loud, Not the son of Lynn Loud Sr and Rita Loud. Your not the brother of Lori, Leni, Luna, Luan, Lynn Jr, Lucy, Lola, Lana, Lisa, and Lily Loud. Your, not the Kid who People called the man with the plan" Lincoln told his reflection

The reflection didn't respond. Like it could.

"Who are you?" He asked it again and then chuckled at himself. "Better yet... Who am I?"

* * *

.

.

.

the person who many people had identified as Lincoln Loud left his home early that morning and walked to school.

Lincoln Loud. Sometimes the name felt alien, even to its owner. Recently it felt like that to the owner of the name Lincoln Loud. However, We'll continue to call him that even though he doesn't feel like Lincoln Loud.

On the walk to school, Lincoln searched through his hoddie pocket to find his pack of smokes and his lighter. He remembered when a girl at the park caught him smoking

"Don't you know that those things can kill you?" She told him with a know it all tone

Lincoln looked back at her and smiled, "that's kind of the point, trying to speed things up" he told her

Lincoln wasn't lying. One day he realized how much his life was hell. The next day he woke up and felt... empty. Suddenly all the bad things shadowed the good. Suddenly things weren't right. Lincoln realized that his family didn't love. While many would argue that the family loved each other, you would be wrong. could parents who cared about their children really let them get kicked out of the house? would sisters really take advantage of their brother's forgiveness? Would they really put their son and only brother in a sweating suit and bring him to the beach?

With every event where his family turned against him, a piece of him broke. People can only take so much.

Lincoln realized all of this a month ago, but did people notice? did anyone ask him what was wrong?

Lincoln loved the feeling when he smoked. He knew he was addicted, but did he care? No. See he loved because it brought him a brief happy feeling. Something that his family couldn't do anymore.

Lincoln pulled on of the cigarettes from the pack and put it in his mouth and then put the pack away and he then lit the cigarette and took a deep breath of the chemicals that would give that kick he needed.

Lincoln Loud was broken. Many people say that humans can't be broken, that is not true, if people could not be broken then why do people break under pressure? why do people become sad? why do some people go insane?

"It's times like these where I like to remind myself of a joke, one that may seem simple until you actually realize what it means," Lincoln told himself "why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"

Lincoln then laughed at his joke. He was sure that no one would really get. He was right. He took him most of his life to realize. what the joke was about. It was one of the few jokes that made him question life but also made him laugh. Not because it was funny but because of how complex it was. The joke itself was Simple yet so complex.

Why did the Chicken Cross the road?

To get to the other side!

Get it?

**_Do you really get it?_ **


	2. Pagliacci

Lincoln was at school. He sat next to his class door and saw that Clyde wasn't gonna show up. It had been a week since he came to school. Lincoln was saddened by this as Clyde was the only person lincoln could tell about how he was feeling, but lately, Clyde was busy. Lincoln still had a couple of minutes before class began, so he pulled out his phone and then went to Clyde's number and called him.

No answer.

"Fuck!" Lincoln said

He hung up the Phone just wandered around the school until the bell rang.

The Bell rung and Lincoln went to his class. and sat in his desk, he pulled the hood of his hoodie over his head and put his head down. He was too tired for this bullshit.

Ms. Johnson walked in the class and began to tell the class what the plan was and what they would be doing. Lincoln didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to hear the same thing that was said every day. Same words a different day. Same problems a different day.

A loop.

It was that life was.

Once you realized that life is a loop the more you grow bored of life, and when this happens life will make your own life bad or boring. Unfortunately, life already gave him that punishment. Once you realized that you, your family, your friends, and your children would live within this endless cycle of doing the same thing, going through the same problems, you realize that everything is meaningless. Sure wars happened, countries argued, people killed others, crimes were committed, but when did that ever stop? Never.

"Lincoln, will you please put your hood down," Ms. Johnson asked kindly

Lincoln did as he was told, as much as he didn't want the light hitting his sleepy eyes he did what she asked. She was just doing her job, after all, she wasn't trying to order him around. Lincoln leaned back in his chair and listened to the lesson that Mrs. Johnson was giving.

* * *

.

.

.

Lunch had finally come around and Lincoln used this opportunity to give someone else a call, He called them a lot now that he was feeling this way. he went to his contacts and called Ronnie Anne. The phone ringed and ringed and ringed but she didn't pick up and it went straight to her answering machine.

"Sup, you reached Ronnie Anne Santiago, if your hearing this then I'm not at the phone, just leave a message," The answering machine told Lincoln

the beep was heard and lincoln decided to leave, what he was sure was his 10th message to her.

"Hey, it's me again" Lincoln began "Look I know that you don't want to talk to me and I understand... I'm sure that getting all these messages from me must be annoying and probably a waste of time to listen to them all..." Lincoln said

Lincoln sighed into the phone, he smiled "I've got a joke" Lincoln said "This guy goes to the doctor, he tells the doctor he's feeling depressed and threatened by everything around him, he tells the doctor that he's scared to get out of bed right? So the Docter looks at the man and says _"The cure is simple"_ The doctor told him _"The great clown Pagliacci is in town, he should cheer you up"_ The doctor told the man, the man, then burst into tears and with great pain along his face he looked to the doctor and said _"but doctor... I AM the great Clown Pagliacci..."_, Everyone laughed, snare drum is heard, curtains close... good joke huh?" Lincoln asked before hanging up the phone

Lincoln sighed, He looked at the clock on his phone and saw that lunch wasn't going to end for a good 20 minutes. Lincoln took out his pack of cigarettes and his lighter. put it in his mouth and lit the cigarette. took a deep buff of it and released the grey smoke into the air. The feeling of joy was felt around his body. Happiness filled him once again. He knew, however, that he would need another just to feel better when he was home.


	3. Party Animal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said: “Fuck off, you won’t bring it back.”

When Lincoln returned home he noticed that the Vanilla was not in the driveway. Lincoln was confused but went inside. When Lincoln entered his home to see that there were streamers, Balloons, party stuff around the house.

"Hey twerp" Lincoln heard

Lincoln turned to face his older sister Lori

"Hey Lori," Lincoln said, "what's with the streamers and stuff?"

"Oh, Mom and Dad are going to head up to Aunt Ruths because she apparently won a cruise and she needs someone to feed the cat's" Lori began "Thankfully, Mom was on our side and she and dad volunteered to head over there and feed that cats, So I'm throwing a party, but since mom and dad are gone this makes-"

"you in charge, blah, blah, blah... I get in Lori" Lincoln said

"Hey! Watch it twerp or-"

"turn me into a human pretzel... I know" Lincoln told her "come up with something better" Lincoln replied and he went up the stairs

Lori was left speechless and confused and a bit angry, "what's his problem?"

Lincoln made his way up to the room and saw Luna playing her guitar while Lola and Lana were arguing

Lincoln walked to his room. and Luna saw him and smiled,

"hey Lil bro! are you excited for Lori's party?" Luna asked with a smile "you could pull some of those crazy Russian dances again!"

Lincoln didn't look to her but he shook his head, "I don't think I'll be coming down for it" Lincoln replied

"what? why not?" Luna asked

Lincoln turned back to her, "do I need a reason?" Lincoln told her with a hint of anger in his voice

"Easy dude, I just wanted to know," Luna said as she rolled her eyes and walked away.

Lincoln entered his room and dodged the twin's little fight. Once in his room, he locked the door and put his backpack down and laid on his bed

he looked to the mirror that was on his dresser and looked at it and began to chuckled sadly, "can't they see that somethings wrong with you?" he asked the reflection

.

The party roared downstairs. Most of the siblings were there except for Lily and Lisa as they were actually put to bed. Lincoln, however, was not inside to enjoy the party, instead, he was outside in the back on the steps and smoking. He needed the smoke as he was indeed not feeling happy, he felt down and tired, it may be due to not smoking one for half of the day but Lincoln blamed it mostly on his mood.

Lincoln took his phone out to see if he got any messages from Clyde or Ronnie. There was none. Lincoln cursed to himself, but Lincoln took another puff of his cigarette

"Aren't you a little young to be smoking?" came a voice

Lincon froze and turned around to see Carol Pingrey, Lori's old social enemy. Lincoln rolled his eyes

"Yeah, aren't you a little young to be acting like my mother?" Lincoln responded

Carol looked at him her eyes went wide a little, "hold up... Lincoln? Your Lori's little brother right?" Carol asked

"Eh... ask her, she doesn't treat me like a brother" Lincoln replied before taking a puff of his cigarette

Carol walked up and sat next to him, "Lori told me that you're a good kid, so why are you smoking something so bad for you?" Carol asked

Lincoln looked at her like she was dumb.

"what?" Carol asked

"Is that all you people seem to notice about me?" Lincoln said

"Wh-"

"Jesus fucking christ... here I thought maybe it was just my family who was blind but I guess it's everyone!" Lincoln cried

Carol was a bit taken about Lincoln's outburst, "Are... Are you ok?" Carol asked

Lincoln took a long puff of his cigarette before dropping it to the steps and crushing it under his foot. "I think I've given enough hints that I'm not ok," Lincoln told her

"What's wrong?" Carol asked

"What's wrong? Everything is wrong... I wake up and deal with Lori's attitude, my sister's problems and stress at my school, and I use to be able to handle it with a fucking smile on my freckled face but when I asked for help or even seem down, do they notice or seem to care? No" Lincoln told her "Every day it's the same problem, same words they say to me 'hey twerp' 'Lincy can you help me?' 'Linc do my make up!' 'hey bro listen to this new jam!' And I agree to help them. Every. Fucking. Time. I agree but if I ask them for something I don't get help..." Lincoln finished

Tears fell from Lincoln's face and Carol noticed and never knew this was what the only brother of the loud family had to go through. Suddenly she began to hear the Loud boy chuckle and it was a complete 180 of his previous mood.

"Did you know that they kicked me out of the house because I made them believe I was bad luck?" Lincoln sadly told her with a smile on her face.

Carol was a bit shocked and was taken back by the words he told her, thinking it was a */7894651302.joke, "y-your kidding right? Lori and your sisters kicked you because they thought you were bad luck?" Carol asked

Lincoln nodded, "do you remember when people took those photos of that squirrel mascot walking around town?" Lincoln asked

Carol nodded

"Well that was me... still have the costume to... in the closet that's right under the stairs," Lincoln told her

Lincoln got up and went up the stairs but before going inside he looked to Carol, "Thank you Carol... thank you for listening to me when no one else would" Lincoln then went inside.

After 3 minutes Carol headed inside to join the party once again.

* * *

.

.

.

Lincoln was in his room and could still hear the music playing downstairs. and then heard a knock at his door. Lincoln sighed and then told whoever it was to come in

"Heya Mate!" came a voice

Lincoln looked to see Tabby, the girl that Luna set him up with at the Sadie Hawkins dance. Lincoln was a bit surprised but he smiled a little when he saw her

"Hey Tabby," Lincoln said with a smile

"It's been a while mate!" Tabby said with a smile "what's up with you?" she asked

"Not much" He replied, "what about you?" Lincoln asked her

"Not much, mind if I come all the way in?" Tabby asked

Lincoln nodded. Tabby walked in and sat on the end of Lincolns bed, Lincoln moved to give her some room but he got up and opened his window before sitting down.

Tabby was confused about why he opened his window but then saw why. Lincoln pulled out his pack of cigarettes, and his Zippo lighter, which had the image of Marilyn Monroe. He lit the cigarette in his mouth and took a puff of it before realizing the smoke into the air and it went out the window

"Wow, bloody hell you smoke Linc?" Tabby asked

"Yep, started smoking about a month ago," Lincoln told her

Tabby was a bit confused about what do to at the moment but did the only thing she thought was right at the time, "mind if I have one?" Tabby asked

Lincoln looked at her, "you ever smoked before?"

Tabby shook her head, "no, but I might as well give it a try"

"I'm warning you... it's gonna hurt the first time" Lincoln told her

He handed her one of his cigarettes and she held it in her mouth and leaned into Lincoln's hand as he lit the lighter once again.

The sensation of cigarette entering Tabby's lungs hit her hard and she began to cough, lincoln chuckled and tabby looked at him before taking another hit, this time, her lungs didn't burn as bad. The two smirked at each other before talking and smoking. Lincoln actually had fun talking to Tabby about what they did after the dance incident.

* * *

.

.

.

Carol was downstairs enjoying the party. she walked around before she stopped. She had just left the kitchen and there she saw a door under the stairs.

_"still have the costume to... in the closet that's right under the stairs,"_

Those words of Lincoln came back to her.

She wanted to see if he was telling the truth. She made her way to the closet, she had to dodge people that passed her. She was right by the door. She took a deep breath in and put her hand on the knob of the door, turned it, and opened the closet door...


	4. I'm the boy who threw the brick

Lincoln and Tabby were outside for Lunch and sat against a wall. Lincoln and she have been talking for a while since the party last night. They enjoyed each other's company, but Tabby knew something was up with Lincoln.

"Hey, Lincoln?" Tabby asked

"Yeah Tabby?" Lincoln replied

"Is something wrong?" Tabby asked "I mean you don't seem like yourself Mate"

Lincoln smiled and looked at her, "you ever felt invisible?" he asked "like your not worths people's attention

"I guess... I mean my younger brother some times get more attention than I do" Tabby said

"Not what I meant..." Lincoln said with a sigh, "How about a joke?"

"A joke?" Tabby asked

"It'll explain how I feel," Lincoln told her

"Ok, tell it," Tabby told him

Lincoln nodded and began the joke, "so, there's this young boy, he's really good at fixing stuff and problems. He's a real master of his craft. Because he's precise. to him, Everything has its place. Anyways he gets asked to build a brick house. He does the math. He figures out exactly what he needs. Step by step. he finishes, the brick house and it's amazing. It's a perfect brick house. Just the way he drew it in blueprints. Only one problem. There's a brick left over. One single brick. He realizes why he still has this brick so he picks up the orphan brick and throws it up into the air as high as she can. And then...um...shit. Messed it up. OK. Forget that joke. Can I tell you another one?" Lincoln asked her

Tabby nodded, figuring that he messed up the joke but kinda smiled at it.

"So Three sisters of a big family die, the oldest sister, the funny sister, and the jock sister, right? They're standing at the pearly gates and god stands in front of them"

"ok, keep going," Tabby said

"So god's there and he's going to decide what their eternal fate shall be: heaven or hell. God goes to the first sister. God asks her _"what gift did I give you?"_ She replies with _"You gave me the gift of responsibility"_ _"What did you do with that gift?"_ God asks her _"I use it as a status and didn't take care take responsibility for my mistakes which cause my sibling's grief,"_ she tells him, God frowns, realizing that she didn't take her gift seriously so he snaps his fingers and the oldest sister goes to hell," Lincoln said and stopped to look at tabby

"alright" Tabby replied

"The funny sister is up next, god asks her _"what gift did I give you?"_ She replies with _"the gift to make others besides myself laugh with joy" "What did you do with my gift?"_ God asks again, she said _"I only made myself laugh while my jokes cause others grief,"_ She told God, God frowned, snapped his fingers and the funny sister went to hell"

"alright keep telling it Mate," Tabby told him

Lincoln nods and continues, "It's the jock sisters turn now, God looks to her and asks, _"And you? what gifts did I give you?"_ She looks up to him and says, _"the power to of strength to protect those weaker then me"_ God nods and asks, _"what did you do with the gift I gave you?"_ She replies with _"I used that gift to turn it around the ones I was supposed to protect"_ She said, God sighs and then snaps his fingers and send the third sister to hell"

"Ok? is there more to this?"

Lincoln nods, "yeah here's the finishing part," Lincoln says "God is about to leave but then, he sees a boy waiting by the gates, he approaches the boy, _"Where did you come from?"_ asks God. The boy looks to God _"Oh I was just standing behind those other guys the whole time, you just didn't see me"_ he told God _"Did I give you a gift?"_ God asks. _"No, none to speak of,"_ says the boy. God gives him a good long look and sighs _"I'm so sorry. I'm embarrassed. Seriously, this almost never happens but I don't know who you are"_ God admits. the Boy looks at God and he quietly says _"I'm the young boy who threw the brick in the air."_ suddenly a sound from above can be heard, something fallings, and it's the brick. God looks up but it's too late. He never saw it coming. It hits him so hard, his brains shoot out his nose. Game over. He's dead" Lincoln finishes the joke

Tabby finally understood the joke and looked to Lincoln sadly before asking "And where does God go when he dies?" Tabby asked

Lincoln chuckles and looks back to Tabby, "He goes to hell" Lincoln replies "Roll on the snare drum. Curtains close. Good joke?" Lincoln asked

Tabby nodded sadly, "yeah... good joke Mate" She replied

* * *

.

.

.

Carol sat on a bench for lunch, she didn't want to sit with Lori at the moment. To her horror, when she looked in the closet last night at the party, true to Lincoln's words. their it lied. The squirrel mascot costume. Carol couldn't believe that the Family she was so envious of, could do something like kicking their own out because they thought he was bad luck.

"Hey, Carol!" Came a feminine voice

Carol was taken away from her thoughts and turned around to see... Becky. Carol sighed in relief, and she waved at Becky

"Hey Becky, what's up?"

"Nothing much, just thought I should talk to you"

Carol was confused, "about what?" Carol asked

"Well... Lori was a bit concerned about you, you started not acting like yourself during half of the party and didn't really seem ok earlier" Becky said

Carol scoffed, "that bitch shouldn't worry about me," Carol said before quickly closing her mouth

Becky was also stunned at Carol's sudden curse, "wow! what was that about?" Becky asked

Carol looked at her, "I'm sorry I'm just a bit... upset at her"

"why?" Becky asked

Carol looked at her and sighed, "h-how well do you know her brother?"

"Lincoln? My White Russian? what about him?" Becky asked

Carol wasn't going to ask about her little nickname and would ask about that later

"He didn't seem like himself... I mean he was smoking and then told me about his family kicking him out all because he lied about being bad luck-"

"Hold up, Hold up?" Becky cut her off, "They did what?" Becky asked with her eyes almost seemingly on fire

"They..." Carl began before sighing, "they kicked him out because he lied about being bad luck"

Becky was simmering with rage, Carol was a bit concerned about Becky's current state but continued to tell the last part

"Do you remember the Squirrel mascot that was caught walking around the town?" Carol asked

"What does that have to-"

"it was Lincoln, he said his family made him wear it because to them it was good luck as long as he wore it" Carol finished

Becky then got up and walked back into the school and Carol quickly followed her

"Becky where are you going!?" Carol said

"Lori" Becky replied "I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind"

"Wait Becky don't!" Carol said, but it was already too late, Lori was nearby and saw Becky and Carol walking back

Carol knew this was where things were going to go bad, fast...


	5. Not In Wonderland

Both Becky and Lori were sitting in the principal's office. Becky had some bruises on her face and a couple of scratches on her arms, while Lori had her hair in a mess and some scratches on her face with a bit of blood coming down her forehead. The Principle, a woman known as Selma Griffen, sat in her desk and looked at the two teenage girls

"can you two please explain why you were fighting in the cafeteria?" Mrs. Griffen asked

Lori was the first to speak up, "I don't know what happened, I asked Becky to check on Carol and then I see them walking back to our direction and Becky just literally started attacking me!" Lori cried

"That's because you're a bitch," Becky said

"Language Ms-"

"Nah, fuck that," Becky said and turned to Lori, "She's always acting like she better than everyone and treats those close to her like crap!" Becky cried

"Becky, you continue this behavior I will suspend you!"

Becky looked at Mrs. Griffen and sighed. Mrs. Griffen sighed and looked to the two girls once again

"Since your mother told me you would be in charge while they were gone Lori, I'm suspending you for three days and I'll make sure to talk to your parents" Mrs. Griffen "and as for you Becky, the same punishment as Lori and I'll be sure to to have the same talk with your aunt and uncle"

They two girls nodded and were told to leave immediately, Lori and Becky grabbed their stuff before leaving, Lori was on her to Vanzilla but looked to Becky who was getting into her car, Lori needed to know why she attacked her. Lori walked to Becky and called out to her

"Becky! Becky wait!" Lori cried

Becky looked to Lori and rolled her eyes

"Becky please..." Lori began "why did you just start attacking me like that!?" Lori cried

Becky glared at Lori, "why!? You wanna know why!?" Becky cried

 **"YES!"** Lori yelled

 **"BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID TO LINCOLN"** Becky yelled back

Lori was stunned, "w-what do you mean?" Lori asked

"The bad Luck? the squirrel suit? and of that ring a bell?" Becky asked

Lori was now frozen in fear and she looked to the red-haired girl, "H-How did y-you find out about that?" Lori asked, "d-did Lincoln tell you?"

"It doesn't matter who told me, just know that this isn't over," Becky said before entering her car starting it up and driving it off

Lori stood, first fear went through her, and then that fear turned to anger. Anger at a certain sibling of hers.

* * *

.

.

.

Lincoln Loud had arrived home from school early as it was Friday, he went up to his room and opened his computer and went to Youtube.

Apparently he needed to find someone who was called crazy, and even if they were, they were someone who provoked thoughts in others. Lincoln tried to find people who weren't famous because they did something that society loved, Lincoln wanted to study someone who was ignored and maybe even cast out by society.

Lincoln looked and looked, he even began getting videos that seemed to suggest serial killers. Lincoln had no idea, he decided what the hell and pressed on the Video. This video talked about a certain serial killer in particular: Charles Manson.

Lincoln Loud was in no way interested in committing murder, however, he had to admit that Charles did indeed seem to have something about him that drew you to him, but not just him, but to his words.

To Lincoln, Charles Manson did indeed seem crazy, and if he met him he was sure that he would call the man crazy, hell even his words seemed crazy at times, but yet... they made sense.

Lincoln researched more about the killer and found a tragic backstory, Lincoln had always heard from others how people like Jeffry Dahmer, Ted Bundy, and even Charles himself were evil and were crazy, and yeah, they killed people, but Lincoln that what most people failed to realize was that They didn't just one day wake up and said "I feel like killing someone today" no, they grew into that because of the harsh or even unfair life, and yes some of them may have been born like that, but people like Charles Manson were made into monsters.

Lincoln understood what he meant sometimes, and sometimes he didn't. Lincoln decided to study about him, for the project.

A few minutes went by and then the front door opened and closed with a harsh slam, Lincoln now wondered what was wrong with whoever slammed the door, suddenly, Lincoln heard something that completely made the hair on his neck stand up

 **"LINCOLN YOU LITTLE ASSHOLE!"** came the voice of the oldest sister

Lincoln heard the raw anger in her voice, so he quickly ran to his door and locked it and then pushed his back against the door hoping to stop whatever Lori was going to do. He felt the banging of her fists on the door and it scared Lincoln

 **"GET OUT HERE! GET OUT HERE NOW! I'M GONNA KILL YOU! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!"** Lori cried

Lincoln, was now completely afraid for his life, the way she was talking told him that there was indeed some truth in her words. Lincoln lowered himself to the ground his back still pressed up against the door. Hot tears rolled down his face as Lori kept threatening his life.


	6. Blind Rage

**"GET OUT HERE! GET OUT HERE NOW! I'M GONNA KILL YOU! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!"** Lori cried

Lincoln, was now completely afraid for his life, the way she was talking told him that there was indeed some truth in her words. Lincoln lowered himself to the ground his back still pressed up against the door. Hot tears rolled down his face as Lori kept threatening his life.

Unforntently, he wasn't strong enough...

Lori had managed to break the door lock and she busted in. Lincoln was now faced with an angry Lori.

"L-Lori Please I-" Lincoln began

He didn't finish his sentence as Lori approached him and the grabbed him by his black sweater and lifted him up.

 **"YOU LITTLE FUCK! DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE!?"** Lori cried

"Lori P-Please! I-"

 **"YOU RUINED ME! RUINED MY LIFE! YOU'VE BEEN RUINING MY LIFE SINCE YOU WERE BORN!"** Lori cried **"EVERYDAY I HAVE TO LIVE WITH YOU! I'M ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU AND HOW TO YOU REPAY ME!? BY RUINING MY LIFE!"**

She then threw Lincoln to her left only to hear a loud crack, she turned to see that Lincoln's head had hit the edge of his shelf and she then looked down to her brother and saw that the right side of his head, his white hair, now was stained with hints of blood, Lincoln was now looking to her. both sadness and hate flowed through his eyes.

Lori had finally realized what she had done and was horrified, "L-Lincoln I'm-"

But before she could finish, Lincoln pushed her to the side causing her to fall on his bed and he ran... he ran so fast out of the door that the older siblings who had to walk home saw him rushing out. They called out to him but Lincoln didn't stop, he ran as far as he could away from the home that didn't care for him... away from the sister that never wanted him.

Lincoln ran, he turned and ran into an apartment complex, he jumped fences before he slipped and landed in a backyard. He landed hard on the ground and yelped in pain. Lincoln lied on the ground. Tears flowed out of his eyes as the realization hit him. He was never loved by his older sister. He was a burden to her... He knew that... but when the words came it hurt. His heart hurt. His head hurt. He just lied on the ground and cried.

"Lincoln?" Came a voice

Lincoln got up quickly and turned to the porch. There he saw a tall girl with red hair and a shirt that showed her midriff. Lincoln knew who she was. This was Becky.

* * *

.

.

.

Lincoln sat on the ground as Becky sat on the couch and wrapped his head in bandages.

"and done!" Becky said

Lincoln touched his head, the middle of it was wrapped in bandages

"Thank you, Becky," Lincoln said

"what? not going to call me babushka?" Becky teased

Lincoln heard the slight strain in her voice but shook his head. Becky looked to the poor boy told him to sit next to her on the couch. Lincoln did and Becky looked at him, her eyes trained on the white-haired boy and looked to his eyes. She saw the same look in his eyes when she was a little girl.

"Lincoln? what happened?" Becky asked

Lincoln looked to her and his head went back down in shame

"Lincoln it's ok to tell me... I promise I won't tell a soul" Becky told him

Lincoln continued to keep his head down and sighed. He could hear the sadness in Becky's words but he was still scared to tell her, however, he knew it wouldn't do any good to keep holding it in.

"Lori... she came home early and was mad at me for some reason. She told me that I ruined her life since I was born... she threw me to the side and my head hit my shelf and I ran out of there as soon as possible..." Lincoln said

Becky was horrified and sick to her stomach. She felt as this was her fault. She had fought Lori and told her what she knew and she assumed Lincoln told her.

"L-Lincoln I'm sorry," Becky said

Lincoln looked at her, "it's fine"

 **"NO, IT'S NOT!"** Becky shouted

Lincoln was taken aback from Becky's outburst and looked to see that she had tears in her slowly forming in her eyes, Lincoln didn't know why this had affected her, but he didn't get to ask as Becky brought him into a tight hug. Lincoln didn't know why, but he could tell that she was upset. It hurt him to know that he was somewhat the cause of this.

"Lincoln... I got into a fight with Lori today because Carol told me about what Lori and your family did to you" Becky said

Lincoln's eyes went wide

"If I have known that it would have caused this I would have never-"

But before she could finish she felt Lincoln's arms wrap around her neck and she heard him sob a little.

"It's ok Becky... You didn't know... but thank you..." Lincoln said

Becky wrapped her arms around Lincoln tighter and smiled

"thank you for being caring when My family didn't..." Lincoln sobbed.


	7. Enough Said

**So! I was currently thinking of ways I can be different from others who write Loud House Fics. It then dawned on me, like Gibbs slapping me on the back of the head, An Idea came to me! I shall make Fanfics involving the sister's friends!**

**That's right! At one point I shall be doing stories about: Tabby, Polly, Haiku, Giggles, Margo, Dana, Becky, Thicc QT, Sam, Mazzy, Jordan, Stella, Sid, Nikki, and Cristina! either as full-blown stories or 1-shots**

**I WILL NEVER DO RONNIE ANNE! NEVER!**

**I don't like her as a love interest for Lincoln as she is more obsessed with her Rep then how Lincoln thinks of her. I do like her and yet I don't. she a touchy subject for me I guess.**

**anyways! back to the story!**

* * *

.

.

.

Lincoln was walking with Becky halfway back to his house. Becky turned to the white-haired boy and looked at him with concern in her eyes.

"You sure you wanna go back tonight? You can stay with me at my house" Becky told him

Lincoln looked back at her with a soft and caring smile, letting her know that he appreciated her concern. Lincoln did appreciate it, but he still needed to go home, she had already done enough for him. Comforting him, bandaging his head, and just caring about him in general. It made him feel better.

"I'll be fine Becky... thank you," Lincoln told her

"Alright..." Becky said "But call me at 8:30 sharp, if you don't I'll be coming to get you and see if your ok"

Lincoln nodded and decided to ask her something that he wanted to since she confessed to fighting Lori.

"Hey, Becky?"

"yeah?"

Lincoln was nervous but decided to continue to ask his question, "why do you care so much about me? with this whole situation?" Lincoln asked

Becky's face fell for a moment but then she looked back to Lincoln. "It's a bit personal... but I'll tell you later, promise," Becky said

Lincoln nodded.

They continued to walk down the street passing by the park. Lincoln quickly looked at the park to see some little kids play and swing. He looked at the sight and felt sad. Sad that he couldn't smile as they could. He couldn't be as happy as he once was, not with everything that had just happened. Lincoln looked away from the park and back to the sidewalk. With every step he took, Lincoln felt as if he was stepping back into a haunted house. He didn't know why he was going back to the place that made him feel so shitty and miserable, but he didn't want to intrude on Becky's life. He was already doing that to so many people. He was already doing that to Lori. When that name came to his head, he felt sadness, but then felt rage. No, this was beyond rage, this was hatred, suddenly all the things she ever did to him came flooding back. Her freaking out on him because of her little break up with Bobby,

 _'fuck him'_ Lincoln thought

How she never once said anything nice to him, always being the boss and never caring about how he or her other siblings felt.

 _'bitch'_ Lincoln thought again

how she constantly degraded him for enjoying the things that he loved. Had he ever told her that Golf was fucking stupid and boring? no. Not once had he ever put her down for everything. The whole sister protocol was bullshit, it was his room, his stuff that they used. His sisters? when did they do anything for him? Sure there was a couple of times but few, very fucking few. He regretted everything he had ever done for his sisters now. He hoped that one day he would be like his sisters, none of them supported him, not even the people who called themselves his parents it was all bullshit.

"-coln, Lincoln? Are you ok?" Came Becky's voice

Lincoln looked to her, and saw her worried face, Lincoln shook his head from his thoughts and then looked back to Becky.

"I'm fine... Just... Just thinking about somethings" Lincoln told her as they continued to walk

* * *

.

.

.

All 5 older Loud sisters were waiting by the door, while Lucy was distracting the remaining four. The 5 were waiting and hoping that Lincoln would walk in the front door. Lori was pacing back and forth, Luan and Lynn were in the kitchen getting dinner ready, while Leni and Luna were waiting on the couch.

Then the door handle turned and then in walked their brother. Leni and Luna were the first ones to rush to there baby brother.

"Oh, Lincy! are you ok!?" Leni cried

"What happened to your Head bro!?" Luna asked with worry

Then Luan, Lynn, Lori came rushing into the front room and they crowded around Lincoln,

"What the heck happened to you Linc?" Luan asked

"Whoever did that I'll kick their butts!" Lynn told him

Lori then hugged her brother tightly, "Oh Lincoln! I'm so sorry I didn't-"

but before she could finish her sentence she was pushed off, and the sisters looked a bit shocked, Lori didn't look shocked, she looked hurt.

Lincoln looked to her with hate and rage-filled eyes.

"Don't fucking touch me" Lincoln told her

All of the sisters were taken aback from their brother's language, but Lori looked scared.

"Lincoln I-"

"You're what? sorry? Don't give me that bullshit!" Lincoln cried

Lori was still in a shocked state as her brother moved a little forward,

"After what you did to me!? Look at my Fucking head, Lori!" Lincoln cried

The other four sisters now realized what had happened to Lincoln. They all looked at Lori who clearly had tears beginning to form in her eyes

"You think I'd be ok with this!? That I just forgive you!?" Lincoln yelled "Well you can kiss that shit goodbye! I'm not your fucking punching bag Lori! I'm not something that you can just take your rage out on everything!" Lincoln told her

"I-I don't treat you like that..." Lori said her voice beginning to shake with emotion

"BULLSHIT! Then what the hell do you call this!" He told her pointing at his forehead. "All because Becky was mad at you for the Bad luck thing!"

All the sisters now were a bit worried. Becky now knew about the family's biggest mistake, the question was how did she find out? and what was she going to do with the information

"Well, at least she cared about my wellbeing! Unlike you!" Lincoln said, "She acted more of a big sister than you!"

Lori took in those words and finally her tears fell from her face. Lincoln, however, didn't stop.

"I hate you! I hate all of you!" Lincoln yelled as he turned to all of them as he said that

"L-Linc... hate's a strong word, you don't mean it," Luan told him nervously

"I do mean it! I mean it with everything in the world! None of you cared how I felt or even how much it affected me when you kicked me out of the house! When I was alone in the rain! When I wore that fucking squirrel suit in the burning heat! None of you care about me! I fucking hate you all!" Lincoln said

Finally, he rushed upstairs and into his room, He closed the door and put his chair against the door handle so that they couldn't bust in, and Lincoln locked the Vent opening and covered it, in case any of the girls sent Lucy up there to spy on him. Lincoln didn't want to be seen, not like this. As soon as he was in his room, he looked around and everything made him sick, the family photo most of all. Lincoln grabbed it off his shelf and threw it against the wall, breaking the glass, before throwing everything off his shelf, kicking his wall, he even punched his wall, he yelled with rage, nothing but raged filled him until he fell to his knees and sobbed.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! FUCK!" Lincoln yelled

Lincoln let out some huge breaths and then sat against his wall. He took out his packet of cigarettes and his lighter and lit a cigarette and took a puff of the cancer stick before feeling relieved, he indeed relied on this for comfort, but they were the only things that could take his mind off things. He took out his phone, unlocked it, scrolled through his contacts before landing on the T contacts. there was only one. He pressed it and put the phone to his ear, it wasn't 8:30 yet so he didn't need to call Becky to tell her that he was ok. Well, as ok as he could be.

 **[Lincoln? Mate you there?]** Came Tabby's voice on the other end.

Lincoln sighed, for some odd reason, a smile came to his face. "Hey Tabby... Can we talk?" Lincoln asked

On the other end, Tabby giggled, **[Anytime mate]** She told him **[anytime]**


	8. sister meeting gets Heated

Lincoln walked down the steps of his home to get breakfast. He entered the kitchen only to be greeted with Luna and Lynn. They looked up to him and waved with smiles. Almost like nothing happened. He groaned and turned around and headed back up to his room. He grabbed his hoodie, and then grabbed his pack of cigarettes, he looked inside to see that he only had four cigarettes left. He cursed under his breath and grabbed his backpack and walked down the stairs and to the front door. However, as soon as he reached the ground level Luna stopped him

"where are you going, bro?" Luna asked

"to school" Lincoln replied

"aren't you gonna wait for everyone? taking Vanzilla will be faster" Luna told him

"I don't want to go in Vanzilla" Lincoln told her

Luna was about to say something else but he left through the door.

Luna sighed and looked down on shame. She went back to the kitchen where Lynn had left to wake up the other sisters. Luna went to the coffee maker and poured herself some.

_"I hate you! I hate all of you!"_

Her brother's words were still stuck inside her head. She shook her head. She wasn't that bad of a sister was she? She liked to think she and Lincoln were close. Luna had always been there for him, even when he was a baby she had told herself that she was going to be the best sister to him ever, but had she? how many times has lincoln been thrown back because of how loud her speakers are, her mind wandered to the bad luck incident.

Luna shook her head 'that was a mistake and we knew it, and we apologized' Luna told herself

but maybe... maybe that was the last straw. They had done so much to lincoln but the bad luck incident. that took the cake. Maybe he only pretended to forgive them. That hurt, that meant that the words he spoke last night were true. Luna felt terrible, she felt like shit. she has been taking advantage of her brother's kindness. They all had.

Luna knew that a sister meeting was in order.

* * *

.

.

.

Becky was on her way to school, she got dressed and grabbed her keys walked to the living room, where her aunt was watching TV. Becky's Aunt, Sophie Hemings was her mother's sister. Her aunt was redheaded like Becky and her sister, she had short hair, on the "Thicc" side of the body spectrum and is a mechanic. Of course, Becky had developed her nerd side from her Aunt, that was a different story for later.

Sophie noticed her niece as she entered the living room and smiled at her

"Hey, your up early" Replied her aunt

Becky turned to her aunt with a smile, "yeah" Becky replied

"Becky, can I talk to you?" Her aunt asked

Becky knew what her Aunt wanted to talk about, It was about her fight with Lori and her suspension for three days.

"Sure Auntie" Becky replied

Becky was gonna tell her Aunt the truth, and if her aunt agreed to what Becky wanted to propose and If things did happen as Lincoln had told her then she along with her Aunt and Uncle would make a decision, which was to take Lincoln with her back home until the Loud Family could get their shit together and begin treating him like an actual sibling or to call CPS on them if they didn't change.

She didn't want to do that. Calling CPS was on her top of fuck no list. She Hated it when she was there. Again another time.

"What happened at school yesterday?" Her Aunt asked

Becky took a deep breath and began telling her Aunt the whole truth, the fight with Lori and why she fought with her, what Carol told her, the squirrel mascot and then what happened last night before they came home. Becky had told her that she had also bandaged Lincoln's head after Lori threw him. Becky finally finished and stopped talking she then looked to her Aunt who sighed and put her head in her hand on the couch's arm.

"Dear god... and hear I thought I knew Rita and Lynn," Sophie told herself "Are you sure this happened?" Sophie asked her niece

Becky nodded, "Carol even saw the Squirrel mascot in the closet," Becky told her

"Dear God" Sophie replied

"Aunt Sophie... can I ask you something?" Becky asked

"What is it, Becky?" Sophie asked back

"I wanted to ask you something, something that we could do for Lincoln" Becky asked

"and what would that be Becky?" Sophie asked her aunt

Becky then told her Aunt what she wanted to do with Lincoln and the Loud Family...

* * *

.

.

.

The 10 sisters of the Loud house held their meeting in Lori's room, but it wasn't Lori who was in charge of this meeting it was Luna.

"We need to talk about Lincoln," Luna told her sisters

"what about him?" Lynn asked in a harsh tone

Luna sighed, she didn't want to deal with Lynn's attitude right now, she looked back to her sisters "For the younger dudettes that weren't there last night, Lincoln yelled at us... and he told us he hates us, all of us"

"Even Lily?" Lana asked

"Maybe not her, she is a baby..." Luna replied "no he's mad at us for a lot of things," Luna told them

"like what?" Lucy asked

"The Bad Luck incident" Luna replied

All of the sisters winced, They knew what they did was wrong. However, none of them had ever apologized to Lincoln, not any of them. So some of them knew how much this might have affected Lincoln.

"Well you can't blame us, he lied to us" Lola replied

"He lied, we, as family kicked out a minor, which is classified as abandonment, and we also made him wear a squirrel mascot to a hot beach, which could be classified as child abuse in both the first and second degree, these two crimes can get both our parental units 10 to 20 years in prison if reported" Lisa replied.

The older sisters knew what this meant. If both of their parents went to prison they would rather have to live with a relative or be put within foster care, and they would be lucky if they didn't get separated.

"So what? It's not Like Stinkcoln would call the cops on us" Lynn told her sisters

"I doubt that" Lisa replied "I've monitored our brother's actions, I have noticed he has all the clear symptoms of depression, I have also found traces of phenols, nicotine, and naphthalene as well as carbon monoxide, nitrogen oxides, hydrogen cyanide, formaldehyde, methane, benzene, ammonia, and acetone" Lisa replied

The sisters looked to the 4-year-old confused.

Lisa sighed, "These are the major compounds found in a cigarette" Lisa replied

everyone gasped

"Lincy's been smoking!" Leni cried

"This is all your fault, Lynn!" Lola cried

"The hell did I do princess!?" Lynn cried

"If it was for you and your bad luck, Lincoln would never be smoking something so gross!" Lola replied

"Hey! your forgetting you're as guilty as me!" Lynn replied

Lola then stopped saying another word. Lynn then got up from where she was and looked to her sister

"Are you sure Lincoln isn't just being a baby about everything?" Lynn asked

Suddenly she was punched in the cheek and she fell to the floor. She rubbed her cheek before looking at who punched her. It was Luna that punched her.

"Are you that dumb!? Our bro is depressed because of us! he's killing himself just by smoking at you think he's just doing this because he's a baby!?" Luna cried

Lynn got up and shoved her sister, "don't fucking touch me!"Lynn replied

"Or what? gonna say I'm bad luck too?" Luna replied harshly

Lynn lost it and tackled her sister. Luna tried to pull her off but they rolled around on the ground, clawing and scratching each other

"Guys stop this!" Luan cried

Lori tried to intervene but she was pushed back, suddenly the two girls had left the room and were now in the hallway. Both separated before Luna kicked Lynn in the stomach and into the wall and grandfather clock that was in the hallway, causing both Lynn and the clock to fall to the ground. Lynn however quickly recovered and got up, Luna rushed at her but she side-stepped and grabbed Luna bay the back and shoved her to the wall by the stairs. Before Luna could recover Lynn tackled her sister, not realizing that they bother were now falling down the stairs.

both girls now lied flat on the ground breathing. Neither has the will to continue the fight.

This would only fuel more problems within the loud house...


	9. Changes

**I'm working on a Fairly Oddparents Fanfic, so that will come one. The reason I'm making it because I recently rewatched the show and thought, "Fuck me I need to make a fanfic about something related to this show quick" and so I'm doing it, but I've been working on it for the past week, which is why there are barely new chapters coming out for my good and popular stories**

**for the next Lincoln ship story you can vote, please!**

**your options are:**

**Lincoln X Polly**

**Lincoln x Margo**

**Lincoln x Stella**

**and Lincoln x Beatrix**

**Go vote now!**

**Please!**

**anyway back to the story!**

* * *

.

Tabby was home from school and went to go work on the homework that she had received that day. However, once she pulled it out and looked over the science problems, she couldn't think about how to solve them, no instead her mind thought about something else. Or rather someone else. No matter how much she thought about something else, it would come back to Lincoln. She was worried about him. She knew he was strong, he had a strong and caring heart. But even people like that suffer pain, both physically and mentally, however, when it came to mental pain it never was easy, people could only suffer so much before they broke. There were many actions one could take when they finally broke, one of the biggest outcomes, well to her young mind was... taking one's own life.

It was wat Tabby felt like this could all lead up to. If things didn't get better, then Lincoln might just... end his own life.

She worried about him, not just as a friend. But as something more.

He may be a bit depressed now, but he was still his old self, he would read comics, laughed at the stupidest jokes she would try to tell back, she even told him some depressing ones she found online. Tabby felt closer to him. He was really someone who knew he was only human. While other people may realize their mistakes, it's only after they screw up. However Lincoln knows who he truly is, this made Tabby just fall for him more. She grabbed her phone which was to her right and looked at it before looking at her homework.

"If I wanna talk to him for a while I need to finish this..." She told herself with a sigh.

Tabby returned to her homework so she could talk to Lincoln without her grades going down. She didn't need them to go down any further.

* * *

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.

.

Lincoln was currently at the park with his sisters Lana and Lola. He was actually kinda smiling when he saw them play. He missed days like this, where he was actually happy to be around some of his sisters. He loved all of his sisters don't get them wrong, but he hated them at the same time and while Luan was right, that Hate was a strong word, he meant it. Lincoln wished they just snap out of their hive-mind and treat him like an actual brother. since the bad luck thing, most of what he's been feeling every time his sisters mistreated him was sadness and rage. Like he wishes he could tell them everything he hated about them every time they made him feel shitty and every time.

Was this how a normal family worked?

do normal families kick out one of their children when they were bad luck?

It didn't sound normal

but then again, what was even normal about Lincoln, he remembered being called a freak since he could remember all thanks to his white hair.

Maybe he was a freak, not because of his white hair, but maybe because of who he was in his family. He didn't have any talent to speak of, he wasn't like his sisters, didn't really accomplish anything so far, his own parents didn't even know what he liked. It was sad to realize that he was an outsider to the family...

Suddenly he heard his phone ring and looked to the caller ID. it was Backy calling. He answered the call and put the phone against his ear.

"Hello?" He spoke into the phone

**[Lincoln do you think you can meet me at the Purpin' Burger?]** Becky asked him on the other side of the line

"Yeah sure... um when?" He asked her

**[Today, maybe around 5?]** Becky told him **[is that ok?]** she asked

Lincoln thought and decided that he could make it, "Yeah that be fine" He told her "But why do you want to meet up?" He asked

**[there's something we should really talk about, just you and me later]** she told him

"What is this about?" he asked

There was no answer from Becky for a minute, but then she finally answered, **[it's about your family and a plan that I came up with, don't worry, it's nothing bad just... just thought that maybe you'll like this plan]** Becky told him

Lincoln was hesitant but told her that she meet him at the time they agreed on.

as time passed it has reached 5 O'clock and Lincoln left the house without saying a word to his sisters, well he left a note. He was on his way to the Purpin Burger where he was supposed to meet Becky. He had no idea what was going to come from this meeting with the teenage girl but to say that he was happy to see her was an understatement. Lincoln actually felt more connected to her than his own sisters in certain ways. Lincoln turned the street when his phone vibrated, he grabbed it and looked at the caller ID, it was Clyde.

Lincoln wanted to answer the call. He wanted to talk to his best friend. Lincoln just swiped to ignore. Lincoln felt his heartbreak a little but it was something he had to do. He didn't want Clyde as a friend. He felt like Clyde had abandoned him in his hour of need.

Lincoln kept walking and finally, he arrived at his destination and he saw Becky already waiting for him by the entrance. Lincoln walked up to her and called out to her, she turned and waved. without another word. Lincoln and Becky entered the building and they ordered some food, and once they got it, they chose a booth in the back where they could be alone and talk.

Lincoln looked at Becky as she was getting her food and started to eat. She took a big bite of her burger before downing it with her drink.

"What is it that you wanted to talk about with me?" Lincoln asked her as he grabbed a fry and ate it

Becky looked at him and sighed, "Lincoln... How would you feel if you came and stayed with me and my Aunt and Uncle for a bit?" Becky asked

Lincoln froze. A million thoughts ran through Lincoln's head, like what did she mean? was she going to call CPC? The Cops? was she trying to take away from his home? From his sisters? Lincoln then stopped himself. He stopped thinking these thoughts as soon as he could. Becky was his friend and he hoped she wouldn't betray him. Lincoln regained himself and looked at her

"What do you mean?" Lincoln asked

Becky took a sip of her drink and then looked back to Lincoln, "I want you to stay with me... I feel if maybe... Maybe if they realize that you are more then just something for them to use that they'll treat you better" Becky said

"So I stay with you and try to get my family to realize that I'm important?" Lincoln asked

Becky nodded

Lincoln sighed, "Why though? wouldn't this cause more problems for me? and maybe even worse problems for you?" Lincoln asked

Becky shook her head, "which is why I'm also giving you a choice Linc" Becky told him

"which is what?" Lincoln asked her

"If you stay with me, and if your family has changed then you can go home whenever," Becky told him

"and if they don't?" Lincoln asked

"Then... I have to do what my aunt did for me" Becky told him

Lincoln knew what Becky was getting at. Lincoln was wondering why she was doing this. Did he really need to be away from his family? Did he care where he was? Lincoln put his hands in his hoodie pocket and felt his lighter as well as the empty pack of cigarettes. He smiled as a realization hit him.

His family was like a cigarette. He enjoyed them like he enjoyed cigarettes, they brought him happiness. But both his family and the cigarettes were bad for him at times. However, he may need a break from both. Lincoln smiled.

"what do you want Lincoln?" Becky asked him

* * *

.

.

.

Both Lynn Sr and Rita Loud were on their way home. After a week of not being around their kids and taking a break from all the chaos was pretty good. They just hoped that everything was ok with their kids and nothing too bad happened

"I can't wait to see the kids, it feels like forever," Rita said

Lynn laughed, "I know, I think this is the longest we've been away from our kids," He told his wife

They turned the corner on their street and drove down. As soon as they were nearing their house they felt almost at ease with finally knowing that they were coming home to their kids. However, as they were entering their driveway, they notice that Becky and Lori were fighting and yelling on the porch. Both were confused and worried. They parked and Rita was the first one to get out of the car and rush to her daughter's side and then Lynn Sr rushed but he ran past to see if the other kids were ok as he clearly saw Lori with tears in her eyes.

"You can't!" Lori cried

"I can! He agreed! You heard him!" Becky yelled back

Rita rushed to the girls and looked at both of them, "what the hell is going on here?" Rita asked

"She's taking Lincoln away!" Lori told her mom

Rita then looked to Becky, "Becky what the hell is she talking about?" Rita asked the red-head.

Becky looked to the two blond women with a glare, "I know about the Bad luck situation Mrs. Loud, as to three other people" Becky told the older women

Rita now froze, she felt her body go numb and stiff. remembering the first thing her daughter told her, she was now scared. Scared of losing her baby boy.

"Wh-What do you mean you're taking him away...?" Rita asked with a shaky voice

Becky breathed and looked to Rita. "Lincoln will be staying with me until you all can learn to treat him better... He's free to come home whenever he feels like you've changed" Becky replied

"Y-You can't just take my son!" Rita cried

"She can and She will" came a voice

all three turned around and saw Lincoln with a phone on his hand he looked to his mom and his sister with a glare and tears in his eyes.

"I have the number of CPS on the phone already put in... All I need to do is hit the call button and talk to them" Lincoln told them

No one said a word

"I-I don't want to do this mom but I will if you force me to stay..." Lincoln said his voice sounding both angry and sad

Rita had no choice, somehow, deep inside her, she knew Lincoln wasn't bluffing. If she did force Lincoln to stay Backy and whoever else knew would call CPS and she would get her children taken away from her. Was it worth it? She looked to her son and tears fell from her eyes. She didn't want to say the words that would break her heart so she nodded and put her hand on her daughter's shoulder. Lori turned to her mother and looked in shock and in fear. However, Lori didn't want to make the situation worst so she took it as her cue to leave.

Rita looked at Becky, "does he have his clothes?" Rita asked

"His rooms completely empty, he wanted to take everything except his dresser" Becky replied "he didn't want what happened last time to happen again"

Rita's heart broke as she remembered that they sold all of Lincolns things and they had to get them back, but she felt bad that Lincoln would think they would do that again.

_'we shouldn't have done that in the first place'_ Rita told herself

Rita nodded and walked up to her porch and there she turned around to see Becky and Lincoln get in her car and start it and then driving off with Lincoln in the passenger seat.

As they were driving Lincoln felt tears fall from his face and he began to sob loudly with some chuckling but it was to feel better. All his emotions were mixed. He was happy and sad at the same time. He then felt the car turn and stop before arms wrapped around him.

"It's ok Lincoln, everything's fine, it's gonna be ok," Becky told him softly in his ear

Lincoln sobbed more but he was feeling much better and thanks to Becky. He stopped and told her to keep driving. They drove and Lincoln looked out the window, he felt a bit better. He was hoping that once he got to Becky's house he could call Tabby.

For once in these past months. Lincoln was happy. and he wanted to share it with someone who also was there for him. There were some other things Lincoln needed to figure out but he could do that this weekend.

If you saw him now he had the biggest smile in the world.

For the time Lincoln loud was happy.

Now the question was how long would that last?

Guess until he needs a cigarette again.


	10. Dropping the Act

Lincoln was having a rough time at dropping the act. Now you may be asking what act?

Well, the act of acting happy.

For the past few months, ever since Lincoln was allowed back in the house he needed to act happy, put on a fake smile, laugh a fake laugh and smile what really should've been a frown. Some times when you begin to play an act it becomes natural and once you try to stop acting it gets harder. You're sad about something but don't want to trouble others so you smile and say that you're fine.

Lincoln was feeling like that now.

Lincoln was indeed glad to be away from his family, but he was hesitant to drop the act not wanting Becky and her aunt and uncle to worry about him, Yet he also wanted to try and not hid things, to not hide his sadness. Lincoln was having an internal conflict that most could never solve. What did it take for people to be better? could he be better? was it ok to ask for help? did he even want help?

The last question Lincoln already knew the answer to. Of course, he wanted to be better. he wanted to be his old self again.

But could he really be that person again?

Lincoln shook his head he looked around that the guest room that they had for him. There was a mirror, a shelf, an old desk that once belonged to Becky's uncle, a laundry basket, and even a TV in the room.

Lincoln took a deep breath before walking up to the mirror. He had changed, his hair was a mess yet it looked better than his original style. Besides that, all that really changed about his attire was the Black hoodie he wore. he looked back to his reflection.

This reminded him of a joke. 

it went like this a leaf and an Emo fall from a tree, what falls first? The leaf because the Emo gets caught by the rope!

Lincoln chuckled at that, he thought it was kinda funny.

Suddenly there was a knocking on the door.

"Come in" Lincoln called

Lincoln looked to see that it was Becky's Aunt.

"Hello Lincoln, I'm Becky's Aunt Sophie, but please just call me Mrs. Hemings or even aunt Sophie if you like, I would prefer that much better though, calling me Misses makes me sound old," Sophie told the young boy with a smile

Lincoln nodded, "Thank you for letting me stay here... Aunt Sophie, I don't mean to intrude on anything if-"

"oh, nonsense! you're not intruding at all" Sophie told the young boy.

Lincoln nodded. The woman left and Lincoln began putting his clothes away and began setting up his other stuff. Lincoln searched one of his bags and found his comics along with Bun-Bun. Lincoln looked at the bunny and a frown made an appearance on his face. Bun-Bun had reminded him just what he use to be like. Kind, forgiving, strong... naive. Now, Lincoln was just a former shell of himself, he could be some of those things again, however, he could never be the Lincoln he once was. He could never be that boy again. Lincoln Loud was dead in a way, now? Lincoln still didn't know who he was.

* * *

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Rita Loud walked into what was her son's room, she looked at how bare and empty if had felt. She looked around and then saw something shine under the bedframe. The matriarch went to it and put her hand underneath it and grabbed something, it was square in shape and it it felt smooth, she pulled it from under the bed and looked to see what it was.

It was the family Photo.

Rita looked at it and saw that the glass was cracked, the cracks surrounded Lincoln as well as the family members. Rita looked at the smile of her only son and realized that her son smile was different, after the whole "unlucky" situation, she would look at her son and felt as if something was off, however, he acted normal, he acted just like he use to but Rita still felt as if something was off.

Finally, she realized what it was, and it was his smile. It was not the same, and it might not be the same.

Rita then thought about how much of a terrible mother she had become. Her own mother would be furious with her. Her father would chew her out more than he had ever in her life, even when he found out she was pregnant with Lori.

"Jesus what was I thinking..." she thought to herself

"You ok honey?" Came a voice

Rita turned to find her husband, Lynn Loud Sr. Rita sighed and looked to her husband, she couldn't help but think about the situation and she wanted to hear what her husband had to say.

"Lynn... are we bad parents?" Rita asked

Lynn looked to his wife and he too looked down in shame. He could tell his wife that they weren't bad parents and that they did a good job and raising their kids, but with the current situation, he knew what his wife was thinking about.

"As much as it might hurt... I think we are" Lynn told her

Rita looked down and sat on the bed. She looked at the picture again and looked to her son in the photo, "do we even know who he is?" Rita asked

Lynn, knowing who his wife was referring to, shook his head.

In all their years, not once had they asked Lincoln what he wanted to do, not once had they asked Lincoln what he felt like, not once had they asked Lincoln what he enjoyed. Both knew little about their own son. What was worse is that they knew who did, know who their son was. Their oldest four knew more about their son.

All the two parents knew about their son was that he liked to read comics and he was friends with Clyde Mcbride. They never knew he liked to dress up like Ace Savvy or help all of his sisters out with their hobbies, they never knew all the things he did for his sisters.

The two left the room and closed the door behind them. To them, the empty room that only held the broken family photo was a reminder of how they truly failed as parents.

* * *

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"Hija! Come here!" Cried Maria Santiago

Ronnie Anne ran out of her room and to the living room where her mother was. Ronnie Anne looked to her mother and her brother was next to her.

"what's up?" Ronnie Anne asked

Maria looked to her daughter with a smile, "Ronnie, Bobby wants to go and visit the Louds this week and since you guys don't have school this week due to half of the building almost being burned down, I agreed for you two to go down there for the week" Maria said

Ronnie Anne grinned, she was happy that she was going to see Lincoln again. It's been a few months and let's just say that she had worked up the courage to admit something.

She had feelings for the White-haired Lame-O.

She was figuring stuff out and decided that she wasn't going to talk to him until she got her junk figured out, which meant she didn't even answer his calls and of he left messages she just deleted them. Not because she hated hearing his voice but because she hated seeing that little notification on the top of her phone.

"Sweet! when are we leaving?" Ronnie Anne asked

"Tomorrow morning," Bobby told her with a smile

Ronnie Anne was excited, this was gonna be the best week ever. She was finally gonna admit her feelings, of course, she wouldn't do it as soon as she got there, no, she still had her rep to look after. She would feel him out and confess by Wednesday.

If only she knew another girl within Royal Woods was feeling the same about the chipped tooth white-haired boy.


	11. What could be but now never can be

**I wanna thank Liger09, MarimenCarmen2, and castiger_48 for the revies as well as the support, and please enjoy this chapter!**

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Bobby and Ronnie Anne had pulled up in the Loud's driveway. Both were very excited to see the family, Bobby, of course, was happy to see Lori while Ronnie was happy to see Lincoln and finally reveal how she feels.

"Ready little sis?" Bobby asked with a smile

Ronnie looked to her brother and nodded, "Yeah, let's go see the Lame-O!" Ronnie said with a smile

the two get out of the car and walk to the front door. Ronnie Anne could feel her heart beat faster and faster. With each step, she was happy that she would see Lincoln that she would finally admit her feelings to Lincoln and was sure it was something that Lincoln had wanted to hear for such a long time, they were on the front porch and right at the front door. Bobby knocked and they waited. Finally, the door opened to see Leni Loud. However, the two siblings noticed that she seemed saddened. When Leni saw them, she said nothing for a while, and then the two became uneasy.

"H-Hey Leni, Is Lori and Lincoln Home?" Bobby asked

Leni's expression worsened after hearing his words, but she nodded before answering, "I'll get Lori..." She told Bobby

"Is Lincoln Not home?" Ronnie Anne asked

Leni stopped in her tracks, and Ronnie noticed this, and she looked to her older brother who looked just as worried.

"Leni? are you-?"

"He's not home... He hasn't been home for three days" Leni said

The two became stunned and worried. the question of why Lincoln wasn't home ran through their minds. Finally, the sound of feet coming down the stairs could be heard and it was revealed to be Lori. She stopped when she saw her boyfriend and Ronnie Anne, she was scared stiff at what was going on. When Bobby saw his girlfriend he looked at her worried, he ran through the front door past Leni and ran up the stairs to hug and comfort Lori but as he was about to put his arms around her, she had stopped him.

To say Bobby was shocked that she had stopped him from comforting her was an understatement, he felt hurt.

"Babe? what's wrong?" He asked

Lori looked at him before breathing in deeply, "I'm sorry..." she said

"Babe it's ok" Bobby said "why hasn't Lincoln been home in three days?" He asked

Lori didn't answer.

"Babe..?"

Lori looked at him with tears in her eyes and Bobby became more worried.

"We need to talk," Lori told him

* * *

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Meanwhile, Tabby was looking at her phone. On the phone was a message that she had typed out for Lincoln, she looked at it and wondered if it was enough to express her feelings, almost thousands of thoughts ran through her head on rather send it or delete it and try and express herself in person.

it's been a day since they last hung out and she was aware of what he was doing. He had also expressed to her how much he had felt better leaving to find himself again and pick up the pieces. Tabby had smiled when she had heard that he was doing much better, and when he said that he wanted to hang out with her the next day because he had also felt better talking to her, it made her heartbeat hard, like a loony toons character.

She then looked at the text that she typed out. She wondered if she even should have written, but she was glad she did, by typing it out, it had helped her realize how she felt. The text said this:

_Hey Mate, there's something I've been wanting to tell ya. K, I'm not good when it comes to this but here goes nothing ig... I like U, and not as a friend but as more, I feel like we've gotten closer, and ik ur going through a lot and Idk how u feel about this but please... think about it? Please?_

Tabby looked over it and then smiled. she put her finger on the screen. She deleted the message.

Why?

It wouldn't feel right over text, no, she needed to tell him how she felt, face to face. If she was going to admit her feelings, then she wanted to see him in person, she wanted to know how he would react. However, one thought came to her mind, it was the image of Lincoln's face looking sad and it showed rejection. She could even hear his voice in her head

_"I'm sorry tabby... I don't feel that way..."_

If that happens, she would be crushed. Tabby quickly shook her head, she told herself not to think like that, she hasn't even confessed yet and she was already putting herself down. No, she needed to be strong and confident. She needed to have hope

Because in the end. That's all anybody really had.

She put her phone in her pocket and left her house to go and see Lincoln so she could confess.

"I can do this" Tabby told herself as she walked down the street.

She just needed to have hope.

* * *

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Lincoln was in his room at Becky's house, he then heard his stomach growl and he he knew what he needed so he got up and headed to the kitchen. He walked down the hall and into the kitchen only to stop as he had walked in a scene that was straight out of a cartoon.

He found Becky's uncle with his mouth full of brownies. He looked to Lincoln and the two stood in silence for a while.

He then spoke, "I'll let you have some as long as you don't tell Becky that I was eating her brownies, deal?"

Lincoln smiled, "deal"

The two smiled before Becky's uncle handed him a piece.

Becky's Uncle, Miguel Hemings, was a skinny Mexican man. He had black spikey hair cut in an undercut. He was wearing his grey shirt button-up shirt with his red tie, a pair of black jeans, and some grey workshoes.

He was a very friendly man and had accepted Lincoln into the house. Lincoln had also heard he to was a nerd as he had a man cave with a bunch of star wars merch. He even had a picture of him meeting with a young Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, and even other pictures with Ewan McGregor, and Ian McDiarmid.

So yeah, Lincoln liked the guy. They had a lot in common, they would even talk about the star wars comics and other stuff with Becky. the only one who didn't enjoy their rants was Aunt Sophie.

"So how are you liking things around her Linc?" Miguel asked the younger boy

Lincoln looked up to the man with a smirk, "I like it, thank you again for letting me stay here"

"Ah it's ok, we're glad to have a kid your age running around the house again," He said

Lincoln looked at him and saw him look around the living room. He was remembering a pretty good memory about a younger Becky.

"what was Becky like when she was my age?" Lincoln asked

Miguel chuckled, "she was a lot like you back then, well she still is in a way"

Lincoln smiled at that, "If I can ask... why is Becky so deadset on helping me?" Lincoln asked Miguel

Miguel looked to Lincoln and his smile fell, he looked to his brownie before looking back at the young boy, "I think she should be the one to tell you... it's not really something me and my wife like to talk about without Becky's permission" he replied

Lincoln took the answer and nodded. He had wanted to know why Becky was so helpful to him when she and he only hung out when Lori had invited her. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. The two looked at each other before looking at the door. Miguel put his brownie down as he walked to the door

"Wonder who that could be?"

He opened the door to see a girl wearing a purple hooded jacket with grey shorts and knee-high purple socks.

"Um... can I help you?" Miguel asked

"Is Lincoln here!?" she asked in a worried way

before Miguel could answer Lincoln brushed past Miguel and into the girl's view. Lincoln looked to the girl only for his eyes to widen as he was stunned to see the last person he least expected.

"Ronnie Anne?" Lincoln asked

Ronnie Anne looked at the white-haired boy, however, Lincoln looked at her and his face became blank.

"Lincoln... could we talk?" She asked

Miguel could feel the tension between these two, but most of the tension came from Lincoln. Miguel looked to said boy and saw that he had put his hands in his pockets.

"Uncle Miguel... I'm going on a walk, I'll be back soon" Lincoln told Miguel

Miguel nodded

Lincoln walked out and Ronnie Anne walked alongside him. Miguel hoped that things turned out ok.

Lincoln and Ronnie Anne arrived at the park, it was the afternoon and the sun was slowly going down, not many people were around, the park almost seemed abandoned. So far the two had not said a word to the other. However, Lincoln stops in the middle of the path and so does Ronnie Anne.

"Why are you here Ronnie?" Lincoln asked her

Ronnie Anne looked to Lincoln and sighed, "because my school got closed for a bit and bobby was coming down here to visit Lori so I came to" she told him

Lincoln looked at her, "did you ever get my calls? what about my messages?" Lincoln asked her

Ronnie Anne looked at him and shame was present on her face, "I did... but I never listened to them"

"Why?" Lincoln asked

"Because I was trying to figure out somethings" Ronnie replied

"So you abandoned me!?" Lincoln asked with his arms flared out

Ronnie looked angry when he said that, "Of course not!" She cried

"then why didn't you answer!?" Lincoln asked "why didn't you respond or try to call back!?" Lincoln asked

"Because I was trying to sort out my feelings!" Lincoln asked

"FOR WHAT!?" Lincoln asked

"FOR YOU ASSHOLE!"

Lincoln looked at her with a shock and pained expression, Lincoln then shook his head slowly in disbelief. "is that all?" He asked her

It was now Ronnie's turn to be shocked by the response

"Is that All!? IS THAT ALL!? How about you say that you feel the same way for me!" Ronnie cried

"feel the same way for you!? Why would I!?" Lincoln cried

Ronnie was frozen, she couldn't believe what she had heard from the boy.

Lincoln looked at her and his anger was still at it's high but he didn't care, she had abandoned him, She had left him in his hour of need for a month.

"Ronnie Anne you left me, you didn't talk to me, you didn't do anything to help me when I needed you! You left me! I needed help! I NEEDED YOU!" He cried "... But you weren't there... you weren't there..."

At this point, Lincoln became to feel tears fall from his eyes,

"Lincoln, please... I-I love you!" Ronnie Anne said

Lincoln could hear the desperation of her voice. He knew that sound so well. It was the same way he had begged for help for someone to help him when he was angry, alone, and crying.

"I don't," Lincoln said

Ronnie was stunned and she looked at him and her anger now flared, "What the hell is wrong with you!? what the hells is so wrong with you that you can be so broken to not feel the same way about me!?"

"TOO MUCH!" Lincoln cried "Too much is wrong with me!"

Lincoln looked at her and she was taken aback from his statement. Lincoln looked at her as tears kept falling from his face

"That's the problem, isn't it? Too much is wrong with me! I'm not manly enough, I'm not strong, I'm not cool enough for you!" Lincoln cried "and I feel like there is nothing I can do about it! Im Broken ok? And there is nothing anyone can do about it!" Lincoln cried

"I can help you!" Ronnie Anne cried "you can be better!"

"Everyones wants me to be better!" Lincoln cried "Everyone wants me to be better them myself, everyone one wants me to be someone I'm not!"

Ronnie Anne looked to Lincoln as he was taking some breaths. Lincoln closed his eyes and whipped his tear away.

"This is it..." Ronnie Anne said, "This is you rejecting me right?" Ronnie asked

Lincoln looked at her and nodded.

He felt a sharp pain before he fell to the ground. He looked to see Ronnie Anne with her hand balled up in a fist, and she had tears in her eye

"I hate you... I hate you Lincoln Loud" Ronnie said as she turned and ran.

Lincoln looked before lying completely on the ground and looking to the sky. "It's ok if you hate me... I hate me too" Lincoln said

He closed his eyes and breathed in.

"Linc! Mate is that you?" came a voice

Lincoln opened his eyes and turned his head to his left and saw who had called him. It was Tabby. As soon as she saw Lincoln she ran to him to see if he was ok

* * *

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Tabby was looking at Lincolns face while they sat on a bench near the park.

"well, Ya gonna get a black eye from that mate," Tabby told, "what happened Mate?"

"I fell down the stairs?" Lincoln replied with a smirk

Tabby rolled her eyes but sat next to him. Lincoln didn't say anything as Tabby sta next to him and then looked right at him.

"Linc, are you ok?" Tabby asked

Lincoln looked at her and saw her face and saw how she was so worried for him. Lincoln could feel tears coming from his eyes again but his face gave her a smile, a pain-filled smile.

"I feel so alone tabby... so fucking alone," Lincoln said as a tear fell down his cheek

"Lincoln... look at me," Tabby told him

Lincoln looked at her and Tabby smiled at him

"Lincoln, you're never alone, you have Becky, her Aunt, her Uncle... and you have me"

Without saying a word Tabby brought her lips to Lincoln's. Lincoln was surprised, he was very hesitant and was worried but he eased into it.

Tabby knew this was way better than telling him.

After all, Actions speak louder than words...


	12. Can't be Ok...

It was Monday morning, the morning was cold but it would heat up later in the day, it would indeed be another beautiful day within Royal Woods. Lincoln would return to school, he still had the black-eye but that was not on his mind. He would be returning to school again, but finally, something was different, and it was not the fourth week till summer, no, it was Tabby. Ever since Tabby had kissed Lincoln, Lincoln was at a loss for words, but he accepted Tabby, and ever since that day, they have been texting nonstop, but luckily it was not as constant as Lori and Bobby. However, there was one side effect...

"So hows your girlfriend~?" Becky asked

Lincoln groaned, "Will you stop... she's fine"

Becky giggled, "I'm happy for you Linc, be good to her," Becky told him "Still can't believe that my white Russian as a Girlfriend!"

Lincoln nodded and went back to staring out of the window. He then looked back to Becky as he remembered the conversation he had with her uncle. It had actually been another thing that had been on Lincoln's mind. He thought it was the best time to ask her why she wanted to help him so badly.

"Hey-"

"Were here!"

Lincoln stopped himself and looked to see that he was indeed in front of his school. He then looked back to Becky. Lincoln sighed but smiled. He would have to ask her later.

"Bye Becky, see you at home"

Lincoln got out and waved bye and headed into the school. As soon as he had entered the school he looked around for the one person that he wanted to be around more than anyone else, but she was nowhere in sight at the moment, so Lincoln decided to head to his locker. He opened it and he put his stuff away before he closed it. Lincoln sighed while he closed his eyes.

"Hey, buddy, what's up?"

Lincoln froze. The voice was very familiar and how couldn't it be. It was his best friends after all. Lincoln to his right to see Clyde. He was not wearing his classic sweater or his pants, no he was wearing a blue button-up t-shirt and khaki pants and his hair was shorter. Lincoln looked at him like he was a new person. Lincoln still could not believe his eyes of who he was looking at.

However, that was not what he wanted to ask his friend, no, Lincoln had a much bigger question.

"Where were you?" Lincoln asked

Clyde smiled, "what? not gonna say how cool I look?"

Lincoln said nothing but stared at his friend. Clyde looked at him and his smile went from happy to nervous.

"Sorry about not calling Linc, I was on a cruise and I couldn't talk to anyone due to not having any reception," Clyde said

Lincoln sighed, he wanted to be angry at Clyde for not being there, but he had a reason. a Valid reason, and it would be selfish of him to be angry at Clyde. Lincoln looked back at his friend and smiled.

"Sorry... it's been a rough week without you buddy" Lincoln said with a soft smile

Clyde smiled before wrapping his arm around his best friend and walking to his right, "well, let's catch up shall we?" Clyde asked

Lincoln smiled, "sure, but you might not like where it goes," Lincoln told him.

The two then walked the halls of the school and Lincoln began to tell his best friend about what he'd been missing. Lincoln felt better to have his best friend back

* * *

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The Louds van pulled up to the house. The only people in the Van was Ronnie Anne, Lori, and Bobby. As soon as they pulled up to the house Ronnie Anne opened the van door and speed-walked into the Louds home. Lori and Bobby saw this and knew she was not acting herself for the past three days, ever since she was rejected by Lincoln. She did not know the whole story of what was happening with Lincoln, but Bobby was told by Lori. Lori continued to look out of the driver's window.

"You fucked up" Came the Voice of Bobby

Lori turned to him to see his head on the dashboard. Lori sighed while she rubbed her head, "please I don't need this right now..." She told him

"What do you need Lori?" Bobby asked, "Want me to tell you that it's ok and you're not at fault? want me to tell you thats it's ok to feel sorry for yourself in this situation? want me to tell you that's it's ok to kick out your brother!? It's Not ok! It can't be ok!"

"Don't" Lori growled

"Don't what? Don't tell you that you fucked up big time?" Bobby said, his voice rising with anger

"And like you so much better," Lori asked

"I'm not the one who kicked out their younger sibling," Bobby told her

"No, but you broke up with me over Lincoln saying some shit about your sister," Lori told him

Bobby lifted his head and looked to Lori, "Leave Ronnie out of this" Bobby told her

"Why? You know she used to Bully Lincoln right? did she tell you how she pulled his pants down in front of the whole school? Did she ever tell you about that!? HUH!?" Lori yelled

Bobby was at a loss of words, he shook his head, "your lying" Bobby replied

"Am I?" Lori asked with anger "why don't you go ask her" Lori said

Bobby shook his head, "this isn't about Ronnie this is about you"

"me!? What about you!? You kicked me aside instead of talking to me when that whole breaking up with me situation happened!" Lori cried

"I did not kick you aside..." Bobby replied

"Bullshit! Do you know how fucking stupid and an ass you can be!?" Lori cried

Do you know how fucking needy you can be!?" Bobby yelled

There were no words for a few seconds, Lori was taken aback, but not Bobby, his anger was still present.

"I ask for space sometimes, but whenever there is the smallest problem, you come calling me in tears over the dumbest shit Lori!" Bobby told her "It is so fucking exhausting to be with someone who is so needy!" Bobby yelled

"I DON'T FUCKING NEED YOU!" Lori cried

"really Lori? Because if you didn't need me you would have been asking me to stay with you this week so you could figure your shit out" Bobby replied

There was silence in the van. it was so tense that not another word could be spoken. The first one to leave the van was Bobby and he walked back into the house. Leaving Lori alone. Lori looked as he left and as he shut the door. Lori slammed her hands on the dashboard in anger.

"FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!" Lori cried as she kept hitting the dashboard

Lori's anger died, only to be replaced with sadness. Lori wept in the car and her head rested against the steering wheel. She sobbed and sobbed, she took in Bobby's words as she cried.

Lori knew she wasn't needy, she didn't rely on him all the time, she never once cried to him, she never overreacted with him.

All of his words were lies.

She knew that.

She then began to wonder if Lincoln had thought the same thing?

Finally, Lori began to question her mind and her actions.

Was she really needy?

was she so obsessed to get attention?

did she really need someone to hold her hand?

that was the big question...

in the end, was she right? or was she wrong?

* * *

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School had finally finished and Now Lincoln was at home with her. He had finished the homework he was given that day. All in all, today was actually decent for him. Lincoln had told Clyde about him and Tabby, and the fight he had with Ronnie Anne, Clyde, of course, was on his side, Clyde had even cussed when he heard what Lori had done to him, Lincoln actually had a good chuckle at that. He had Hung with Tabby and Clyde during lunch. Of course, there was a lot of eyes on Lincoln and Tabby when they were holding hands in the lunchroom, but Lincoln didn't mind, he was actually starting to think that things were getting better, he just had to hope that his family would maybe become better, he didn't care about their flaws, he knew that those might always be there, but he hoped that maybe they finally realized how he felt.

However, Lincoln had kept his promise that he made to himself that morning.

He was right now, in front of Becky's door and he was preparing himself to talk to her. Living with Lori had taught him not to enter a girl's room without permission, especially if they were teens.

Lincoln knocked on the door and waited.

"Come in!" Becky called through the door

Lincoln turned the knob and opened the door. He saw Becky in her usual outfit and she was sitting on her bed with her computer on her lap. She turned to see Lincoln and smiled

"Hey, Linc, what's up?" She asked

Lincoln took a breath in before closing the door and walking closer to her, "I just wanted to ask you something Becky"

"Ask away Lil' dude," Becky said as she closed her computer and set it aside.

"I wanted to know something... And it's ok if you don't want to give me a full explanation but I just wanted to know because it's been on my mind for a while" Lincoln told her

"What is it?" Becky said with a soft smile, "I promise to try and answer it as honestly as I can"

Lincoln took a deep breath and closed his eyes before looking at Becky, "Why are you helping me?" Lincoln asked

Becky smiled, she got off her bed and went to her dresser and picked up a photo. She walked back and sat back on her bed, she then signaled Lincoln to sit next to her on her bed. Lincoln did so and Becky showed him the photo.

"This was when My Aunt first took us away from my parents... notice anything?"

Lincoln looked at the picture and indeed saw something the surprised him. on a 6-year-old Becky's back was a 5-year-old boy.

"who's he?" Lincoln asked while pointing at the Baby

Becky smiled, "that's my baby brother, Charlie" Becky replied

"Your brother?" Lincoln asked, now very confused

"Yep, he would've been your age by now" Becky replied

Lincoln heard her words carefully, but he decided to ask.

"What happened to him?" Lincoln asked

Becky looked at him, "He's dead"

Lincoln gasped, "I-I'm sorry! If you don't-"

"No, no... it's ok, besides it also has a lot to do with why I'm helping you" Becky said, "Well, wanna hear it?" Becky asked

Lincoln nodded, "only if you want to"

Becky smiled softly and nodded.

* * *

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**you asked and it shall be... in the next chapter, Becky's backstory shall be told**


	13. A memory of a broken Life

"What was he Like? you brother?" Lincoln asked

"well... he was a lot like you in some ways, he was strong, he tried to cheer me up when he saw that I was sad, he was wild, like your younger sister Lana, But again he liked to just read comics or even picture books"

Lincoln smiled before it was replaced with a frown, "what happened? how did he die?" Lincoln asked

Becky closed her eyes and took a huge breath in and exhaling and she then looked back to the picture, "At the time, My brother was six and I was twelve... My father was a drunk who ran out on my mother after Charlie turned 4, and my mother, well she wasn't a very good person either" Becky Began "she was cruel... mostly to Charlie, I never knew why but she was"

"I'm sorry" Lincoln replied

"It's ok Lincoln, It's in the past" Becky replied before continuing her story, "Anyway, we lived in an apartment building which was a shithole in Detroit, but we managed. We tried to act like everything was normal, to us, that was normal, however, I envied other kids when I saw how nice their parents were, I wanted that life for myself and for Charlie"

Lincoln listened, with each word, he felt pity for Becky, He was crying because his family had kicked him out for a lie he told about himself, while Becky had lived a horrible life and her only brother was dead. Was Lincoln just being a brat? because he sure felt like it.

"My mom would get angry at us, she would hit us but would beat Charlie more, I tried to protect him the best I could, but she would always push me aside and beat Charlie... I remember crying and begging her to stop so she wouldn't kill him, I remember once that she threw a beer bottle at him and he a shard of the glass below his eye, I was so scared that she might have blinded him" Becky continued her story "One day, Charlie got sick, just a common cold, but he had to stay in bed... and I regret that day every single day of my life"

Lincoln looked at her hesitant and afraid to ask her what had happened, but he didn't want to, afraid that he was already pushing her, but the words left his mouth before he could stop himself. "what happened to him?" he asked

"I came home that day to see him on the floor and bleeding from his head. I called the ambulance, and they came just in time. He recovered, and C.P.S got involved and our aunt took us in along with my uncle, we stayed there for a week and both of us thought that our loves would get better... but that wasn't the end to the abuse" Becky replied "Our mom managed to come to our school and she took him right out of school's playground and took him home, the only reason she couldn't take me was that I was still in class and she had no way of taking us out, except for kidnapping us, which she did with Charlie"

"What happened next...?" Lincoln asked with concern and was hesitant

"The school called the cops and they looked at the school's security and saw my mom and found her in the apartment... but it was already too late..." Becky said

"Becky, if-"

"She had choked him for crying and not listening to her..." Becky said, her voice was now clearly breaking "I know it's not my fault... but back then, I balmed myself every day for what happened" Becky finished, some tears were coming down her face

Lincoln looked at her with some tears in his eyes and he turned to hug her, Becky accepted the hug and, "It wasn't your fault... I know that you might already know that, but I don't think it was ever your fault, and I don't think Charlie blamed you either" Lincoln told her

Becky looked at him with a soft smile and some tears still falling but she was already feeling better thanks to Lincoln, He knew how to make people happy, just like her brother.

"I feel stupid now" Lincoln replied

Becky broke the hug and looked at him, "why?" Becky asked

"because... you lived with an abusive mother and lost your only sibling, and me? I'm crying because My family kicked me out for some dumb lie I decided to go along with" Lincoln sniffed

"Hey, listen Lincoln... what they did was the abuse, no matter what, they never should have believed it in the first place or taken it that far, and no matter how stupid it may seem to you, it was no better than what my mother did. So don't ever feel stupid about that... I know that you might feel like your just being a baby but you're not ok?" Becky asked

Lincoln nodded and he hugged her once again. They stayed like that for a while before they parted and decided to go see what was for dinner. Becky was glad she had told Lincoln actually, she enjoyed his company and his hugs. it was Like having a little brother again, she missed her brother dearly, but now? now she can be there for someone who was now, just like a little brother to her.

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It was the next day, and Becky arrived at school a little late because she had forgotten to set off her alarm and so did Lincoln. They went to a coffee shop and Becky got herself ad coffee and Lincoln got himself a donut and then they raced to school. She dropped off Lincoln and drove as fast as she could to her school. Once there she saw the time and saw that she still had a good 30 minutes t spare and entered the building. There, by the English class door, was Carol and Dana talking, she was about to approach them, but she then felt a hand grab her wrist, she turned to see that last person on earth that she ever wanted to see: Lori.

"We need to talk," Lori told her

Becky moved her hand away from Lori's grip harshly and looked to her. "we've got nothing to talk about" Becky replied with a growl

"Please Becky... Can we just talk in private?" Lori asked

Becky looked at her with a glare and looked at her more closely. Lori had bag under her eyes and her hair was disheveled. Becky could tell that Lori was having a hard time. Becky wanted to tell her to piss off and tell her that she deserved what was happening to her, but for some odd reason, she couldn't do it.

"Fine" Becky replied

Lori sighed and told Becky to followed her. Lori leads Becky to the back of the school so they could talk in private. Becky was very skeptical of Lori at the moment, she knew Lori more than dana or Carol, both thanks to being her friend and thanks to Lincoln. Once they reached the back, Lori looked to Becky and steeled herself to talk to her friend.

"how's Lincoln?" Lori asked

"Oh? you care now?" Becky asked back

"Please, How is he, Becky?" Lori asked again

Becky looked at her with a glare but she stopped herself from being mean and would answer her question. "he's great" Becky replied "he seems to be doing better"

Lori nodded, "Is he ready to come home?" Lori asked

"He'll come home after you people change your attitude with him" Becky replied

"How can we?" Lori asked

Becky was confused, "the hell do you mean?" Becky asked

"I mean how can we change if he can't tell us what's wrong!" Lori cried "How are we suppose to change when he can't even tell us what we need to change or how we need to change!?"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now Lori!? You really need him to point out the obvious!?" Becky cried "how about not being so harsh on him!?"

"I am not harsh on him" Lori replied

"oh really? then what about you throwing him into his dresser!? that wasn't harsh?" Becky cried

"I know I didn't handle that the right way ok!? but I mean what's so wrong with me that I need to change!?"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now!? Really!? You can't think of anything wrong with you!?" Becky cried "I can name a lot of things wrong with you Lori"

"Like fucking what!?" Lori asked

"You're selfish! You treat your younger siblings like they owe you or something! You care more about what you want then what people want!"

"I do not!"

"Really!? Because If I remember correctly you wanted Lincoln to date Bobby's younger sister when he was being bullied by her, and then freaking out because Bobby broke up with you because of Lincoln! Did he even know she was Bobby's younger sister?" Becky asked

"I-"

"Listen to me Lori, Lincoln and no one else can tell you how to change because you need to figure that shit out for yourself!"

"You don't understand!" Lori cried "You don't understand the stress of living with a big family, how it feels to be overwhelmed with so many people not listening to you! They act like they wild animals, and it's embarrassing to live with people like that! "

"Lori are you even listening to yourself!? You're blaming everyone but yourself!" Becky cried "Look, it's not your sibling's fault that you treat them badly, it's not Lincolns fault for whatever is going on with you, and it's not anyone's fault that you can't see what is wrong with you... It's you, no one else, just you"

Lori was stunned and now she was even more hurt than before. She stood there, no words, but she let Becky's sink in. Lori wouldn't allow herself to accept her words, but ni matter what, Lori knew those words were true. Just like Lincoln's words were true, and just like Bobby's words were true.

Becky looked at her and shook her head at the girl, "fuck... what more is there to say Lori" Becky replied

Becky turned her back on her friend and left so Lori could think about what she said. She just hoped that Lori would get off her high-horse and see who she really was. A bitch.

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**I wanted to say that if you felt like Becky's backstory wasn't detailed enough, there's a reason for this. You see While she shared her past with Lincoln I'm sure that she wouldn't go into so much detail and instead just give the details that she thought were important.**

**I got this idea from my friend, who told me that Some people, himself included, didn't always like going into detail when it came to their past, they always told people the basic stuff, and I felt that he was speaking the truth and I have felt that way to where I don't want to get into detail because it feels bad and makes me remember some stuff too.**

**Also if you think that I'm being unfair to Lori's character, I'm not. I feel like she is stubborn and wouldn't admit her flaws and instead ask others what her flaws, which is why she needs Lincoln to tell her what she needs to change, which again is another example of her dependence on people.**

**Also, I will tell you guys that I also listen to depressing music or watch depressing shows. One's show that's got me writing more often with this story then my other ones is Bojack Horsemen. It's great and honestly, is the inspiration for some of the depressing bits.**

**So until next time.**


	14. Where Did All The Love Go?

It was Wednesday morning and Lincoln had arrived at school early only because Becky had woken up much earlier for some reason. He walked into the front doors and he looked at the few kids that arrived early for school today. In the corner was Chandler and Papa Wheelie and next to their locker on their phone was Cookie, in another corner by one of the classroom's door was Boy Jordan talking with brownie and Shay. He knew he would have to wait for Tabby to come later but that's one of the reasons he was actually willing to come to school these days. Tabby was a major factor in helping himself get better. She was one of the many lights in the darkness. Jeez... Sometimes Lucy's poetry was really getting to him.

As soon as he thought about his goth sister, he felt a little sad, he wondered how they were all doing, sure he was mad at them but he still cared for them. He remembered how much he uses to like helping them with their problems, he made him feel wanted, but after the Bad Luck situation he saw it as a burden, he saw it as them not caring about him. After everything they did to him, they returned to acting like everything was normal. He hated that, and that's one of the reasons he hated his family so much. People say that you can't hate the people you're related to, and that was not true. Lincoln hated certain habits of his sisters.

Lincoln shook his head. He didn't want to think about his family right now... but he felt he should talk to them today and see how they're doing when they got to the school he knew the first sister he wanted to talk to.

Lincoln pulled out his phone and saw a missed text from Tabby. He opened his phone and saw that it was a link to a song, Lincoln wondered what song she had sent him this time, he pressed on the link and it went to OurTube and a song began to play. The Song was called "Dead Inside" By Younger Hunger.

"Hey pretty baby with the sun in your eye~ You make me feel like I'm up in the sky~ I wanna tell you, wanna make you mine, ah hey~"

Lincoln liked the song so far and it had a catchy tune. it spoke to him in away.

"I'm all talk with a thorn in my side~ I got a real big heart that I'm willing to hide~ You ask me what I want from life, I said to~ Make a lotta money and feel dead inside~ Make a lotta money and feel dead inside~ Make a lotta money and feel dead inside~"

Lincoln smiled at those Lyrics, it was true for a lot of people. Believe it or not but when he listened to music with sad lyrics or a sad tune it actually made him feel better. Lincoln pressed the like button on the video and it was saved to his liked videos. He was sure that he would be listening to it again at some point. He felt like today was gonna be a good day. He didn't know why but he was sure that today was going to be good for him.

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Meanwhile, back at the Loud residence, the oldest sister was in the bathroom. Lori Loud looked at the mirror and she having trouble. She was too worried about the things going around her. School sucked, home sucked, everything suck. Her anxiety was hitting hard, she had been worrying more than she ever had in her life. She couldn't stop her anxiety from skyrocketing. She needed something. Anything.

Lori opened the mirror and inside there was her toothbrush as well as her other siblings and next to it was some aspirin, and a few pill bottles away were what she had been looking for. Luan's Xanax pills. Lori knew that Luan needed those for whenever she had a was having anxiety before performing in front of a large crowd of people. if it helped Luan, then it could help Lori with her anxiety.

Lori took one and then turned on the sink and grabbed a cup on the counter and filled it up and she put the pill in her mouth before using the water to swallow the pill. It didn't have an imidate effect of course, but Lori was sure that she was gonna need it.

Lori walked down the stairs and told her other siblings to get ready for the day, they left to change and get ready for the school day. Bobby and Ronnie Anne were still sleeping while everyone was getting ready, both were sleeping in Lincolns room. Ronnie on his bed and Bobby on the ground. Lori just waited as she was ready to go, she sat on the couch and she could feel the pill take its effect.

Lori's mind and body began to relax and her anxiety began to dissipate. she felt better. Lori now knew how to rid herself of anxiety. She was glad that she ha found an escape. An escape from everything that was currently happening, She needed this. Lori continued to wait as her anxiety was now gone. A smile covered her once sad face. She was just happy to find an escape...

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Finally, the bell rang and everyone ran for the lunchroom, and who could blame them, it was sloppy joe's today. The school's sloppy joes were actually pretty good and Lincoln enjoyed them, but he had other important things to do. Lincoln left his class and headed to the Gym, and once he arrived he went to the bleachers and then turned to look under them. Sitting there was Lucy, she was writing under the dark bleachers with a flashlight. She looked to be struggling with writing in her poetry book.

"I overwhelmed you like the roaring sea.

I swatted you away like a bee.

I had stung you deep.

Actions that I would later reap.

I wish I could take it all back.

You had gone off to a dangerous track.

so that expression would never show.

please... don't go..."

Lucy was looking at the word that she had written on the notebook and sighed. The words she had written were deep and she meant every word but... was it enough? could Lincoln really forgive her? most importantly, could she really change for the better? Lucy sighed again and was about to erase the words on the page but then-

"Hey Luce"

Lucy was startled and she eeked and looked to her left. Standing there was the person she had been worrying about. Lincoln stood there.

"Now I know how you feel" Lucy replied in her monotone voice

Lincoln chuckled and walked to his younger sister and then sat next to her. Lucy was wondering why Lincoln had come to visit her when he was the one that had left them so he could be better. She looked at him and Lincoln looked back to her, he could not tell what she was thinking, this was, of course, do to her face being completely emotionless. Lincoln just stared at his little sister for a while before he began feeling awkward.

"what is it?" Lincoln asked

"Why are you here?" Lucy asked

Lincoln looked at her and he closed his eyes and looked away from her, he was thinking for a minute and he turned back to her with a smile on his face. "I came here to see how you were doing" he replied

Lucy's expression didn't change, "why? I thought you hated us" she replied

"I don't hate you... I don't hate any of you..." Lincoln told her "I just hate how you all treat me," Lincoln told her

Lucy looked away from him and stared at her feet, she knew what he was talking about, after all, she had all the time in the world to reflect on her past actions. She couldn't deny his logic, nor could she deny that she was innocent, she was as guilty as the rest of her family. They had treated Lincoln harshly, they loved him, she knew that all of her sisters loved their only brother, but... they never realized that they turned on him a lot. They outnumbered him in everything, to the sisters, Lincoln never really had a say in anything, he had not done all the things that the sisters were allowed to do, and yet he sacrificed for them on a regular basis. They took advantage of his kindness.

"I'm sorry," Lucy said "I know that it might not mean much... but I am sorry Linc... You've always been there for me, no matter what, but when you needed someone, when you needed me, I turned my back and left you out in the cold. I'm sorry Lincoln, I'm a terrible sister..." Lucy told him

Before anything else could be said or done, Lucy was pulled into a side hug by Lincoln and she was a bit surprised. Lincoln smiled and looked at his sister.

"You're not a terrible sister... I never thought that I just always thought I was a terrible brother, I still think that some times" Lincoln told her "But I've learned that we all mistakes, big or small, all that matters is how we fix those mistakes" Lincoln finished

Lucy looked away from him and brought him into a tight hug, and Lincoln tightly hugged back as well. Lucy sighed in relief and a smile made its way on her face. Lincoln didn't see it, but he knew that Lucy meant her apology. He was just glad that things were indeed starting to get better, and Lucy was the first sign of that.

if he knew how wrong he was...


	15. Save That Shit

it was a cloudy Friday afternoon, the school had just been let out and one Ronnie Anne Santiago was walking down the sidewalk. She wasn't doing anything, she wasn't listening to music, she wasn't even on her phone, no, she was just thinking. Thinking about how she had messed up. How she messed up her chances with Lincoln. Even if she was figuring things out she should have been there for him, she should have consoled him and told him that everything was going to be ok if only she could take it back. She hated thinking about this, part of her didn't want anything to do with Lincoln, he was the one that broke her heart, but a much larger part of her told her that it wasn't right to be mad at Lincoln, he had every right to be mad after all. He had been alone with so many problems, so many problems that he couldn't or wouldn't tell anyone about, but she knew that he couldn't hold in all his anger, all his sadness, no one could hold that all in for long, one way or another, those feelings and emotions would come out. Ronnie Anne knew things had become much more complicated than they were before. She had also been worrying about how things would end up between Bobby and Lori.

For the past couple of days, Lori had seemed more relaxed then she has been, hell it was odd, she wouldn't even stress over if someone had gotten more likes on swiftypic. It was very odd behavior for the girl, and Ronnie knew her well. Bobby... well, he was handling things as best as he could, but he still couldn't make conversation with Lori, he had just been wondering about the situation. She hoped that things got better soon because, in just two days, the two siblings were leaving to go back home.

Ronnie continued walking until she tripped in a piece of the sidewalk that was protruding slightly up. she hit her left elbow hard as soon as she fell and brief pain surged through it and she swore under her breath.

"Oi! you alright!?" Came a voice

Ronnie Anne looked up and saw the last person she wanted to see. Tabby was standing a foot away from her. Ronnie had seen her and Lincoln holding hands when she saw them at the school or walking home. Tabby had also been told about Ronnie Anne and knew she was the one who ignored Lincoln as well as gave him a black eye. As soon as Tabby saw that it was Ronnie Anne, her demeanor slightly changed from concern to annoyance.

"Oh it's you," Tabby said, the venom in her voice was clear

Ronnie Anne got up with a groan and didn't take Tabby's hand and began to get up herself. Tabby rolled her eyes and she walked past Ronnie. Ronnie looked back and watched as Tabby walked away, She had felt a bit of anger at the girl, she was the one who was with Lincoln, she was the one making Lincoln happy... and it wasn't her. Ronnie Anne needed to know, she needed to know why after everything Lincoln and she had been through, she had chosen her, someone he barley started hanging out with. What made them different?

"WAIT!" cried Ronnie Anne

Tabby stopped and turned to look at her. They stood there for a few seconds and Ronnie Anne took a deep breath.

"Can we talk?" Ronnie Anne asked

Tabby eyed her with suspicion but decided that maybe it was time for them to talk. They were in love with the same boy after all. Tabby nodded and Ronnie Anne walked up next to her as they walked.

"so, what do you wanna know?" Tabby asked

Ronnie looked at the ground for a few seconds before turning her head to Tabby, "I wanted to know why he chose you" Ronnie Anne asked "I don't mean to sound like a bitch but I just wanna know... why? what makes you different from me?" Ronnie asked

Tabby understood the question clearly and she too uses to ask the same question. Why had Lincoln agreed to be her boyfriend when they only began knowing each other for two weeks, however, tabby had actually found out why everything Lincoln told him about her allowed Tabby to understand what made them different.

"It's because you can't express yourself" Tabby replied

Ronnie looked at Tabby, confused with her answer, "what do you mean?" Ronnie asked

"You expressed liking him by bullying him. You couldn't just talk to him and try to get to know him first, you just bullied him, even after you two became friends, you never could express yourself to him without being... a bitch, sorry" Tabby told Ronnie

Ronnie Anne heard the answer and looked to the ground as she began thinking about how much of it is true. Ronnie began to realize that she was right, she always wanted to be tough, and not emotional, so when she began feeling things for Lincoln, she did the only thing she could, and that was bully him, She didn't want to feel that way about him that way. Back then, she had thought he was a geek and a dork, someone who wasn't even worth her time, however, she began to realize why she liked him, but she never could express herself without being rude or accidentally hurting his feelings. She was always worried about how people saw her, she was always worried about how people viewed her.

"In other words... I wasn't being honest with myself and him"

Tabby nodded, "The reason I think he may have chosen me was that I understood him, I related to him, I was truthful with him, about everything and about my feelings" Tabby replied

"but aren't you worried?" Ronnie asked

"worried about what?" Tabby asked

"About how people see you when you're dating him?" Ronnie asked

Tabby scoffed, "I don't care about how people look at me and him" Tabby replied, "I learned that people are always gonna judge you, but should it matter how a stranger, someone you don't even know, thinks of you?" Tabby asked

Ronnie Anne thought about what Tabby and when she finally saw why Lincoln had picked Tabby instead of her. Tabby didn't care about how others thought about her and Lincoln being together, no, she only cared that she was with Lincoln. While Ronnie? She was always how she would bee seen if she dated Lincoln, what people would say, what people would think. In the end, Ronnie Anne realized that she was being selfish and only worried about herself, and because of that and because she couldn't express herself in the right way... she had realized that she had missed her chance a long time ago, maybe even since the very beginning.

"T-Thanks for the talk... I think I have the answer now" Ronnie Anne told Tabby

Ronnie Anne then ran back to the loud house, tears fell from her eyes as she had finally faced the truth about who she was and how she acted. The question now was simple.

Could she change?

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Lynn Loud was at the park for one reason, and one reason only, because she needed to talk to Lincoln. She had known this is where he went for his daily walks. and she was going to confront him and bring him home. He was acting like a baby, and she was going to slap some sense in him and show him that he was tearing up the family from the inside.

She waited for him, but as most know, Lynn wasn't someone that liked waiting. He was almost about to run and find him but as luck would have it, Lincoln had turned around the corner.

"There you are!" Lynn cried

Lincoln jumped in surprise and looked to see Lynn. "Lynn? what are you doing here?" Lincoln asked

"I'm here to bring you home Linc!" Lynn said as she quickly walked to him so she could grab hi and bring him back home.

Lincoln backed away, "Lynn stop!" Lincoln told her

She managed to grab him by his hands but Lincoln pulled his hand away. Lynn looked back at her brother and her expression went from anger to confusion. Lincoln glared at her, his anger was now very present. They stood there for a moment, and Lynn decided to speak up.

"what's your problem!?" Lynn cried "Stop being a baby and come home, you're just doing this to get attention," Lynn said

Lincoln was dumbfounded at her words, "Are you fucking kidding me!?" Lincoln cried

"What? it's true!" Lynn yelled

"Fuck you, Lynn! Why can't you see that I am in actual pain!" Lincoln cried "why can't you stop thinking about yourself!?"

"I don't just think about myself!" Lynn yelled back

"Bullshit! Have you ever thought about how much you made me hate myself!? Have you ever thought about how I feel when you call me names? did you even THINK about how I felt when I was kicked out of the house because of you and your stupid luck!?" Lincoln cried

"I-"

"NO!" Lincoln cut her off "Your done talking! Every word that comes out of your mouth is going to be about how I messed up! about how I'm and fault! how I'm the problem! But you never look at yourself and see how much of a bitch you can be!? NO! Because all that goes through your thick skull is how great and amazing you are!" Lincoln finished

Lynn looked at her brother with a painful expression on her face, his words hurt her, they shouldn't have, she knew they weren't true, but they hurt. Lynn knew she wasn't a bitch like Lincoln said, she wasn't who he said she was. Was she? No! of course not! she was Lynn Loud, she was a great athlete and a great sister. She was the best sister! right?

"Your wrong" Lynn told him "you're just trying to hurt me"

Lincoln scoffed with a smile, "of course that's what you think..." Lincoln said "It's always me... never you," Lincoln said

"Lincoln just come home, stop being like this and just come back," Lynn said

Lincoln sighed, "why do I even try to talk to you? you never listen, Lynn... Try looking at what'st wrong with you... and then maybe, maybe I'll come home"

Lincoln walked away, he could see the conflict in Lynn's eyes. However, he knew that she probably the last person that would change. He knew that she couldn't see her own faults, she couldn't even admit them to herself, that's how much her ego had gone to her head. He turned his head to look back and saw Lynn walking away. He was surprised that she didn't chase after him. Maybe he had gotten through to her... but he doubted it, she was Lynn loud after all.

Almost nothing got through to her...

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**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. The next chapter is going to be a rough one! What should you expect!?**

**Lynn confronts her faults...  
**

**Lori and Lincoln look at stars...**

**and something terrible happens...**

**Lincoln smokes...**


	16. Edge of Darkness

**We only now have 3 chapters left of this story! :'(**

**I am sad that this story is already coming to an end, but I'm also glad to know that so many people love this story! so again I want to thank everyone for the support as well as the reviews on this story as it has meant so much to me.**

**But hey! I got more depressing stories coming your way, so if you wanna see those then just wait, trust me more stories like this will be coming soon.**

**Anyways let's get back to the story** **  
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Lynn Loud was currently In her room by herself. Everyone else was gone, Luan, Luna, and their mother had gone to the pharmacy as Luan's pills were almost gone, which Luan said was strange because she didn't take that many.

Well, back to Lynn, who was bouncing a ball off the wall and catching it. She was currently thinking of her current crisis. Confronting her so-called "faults". Lynn didn't believe that she had faults, sure she can be a bit competitive and jealous, but she wasn't that bad, like Luna, Lincoln, and Lucy made her out to be. No, Lynn Loud Jr. was a perfect athlete and one of the coolest sisters in the Loud Family. How could anyone not like her?

_ "Every word that comes out of your mouth is going to be about how I messed up! about how I'm and fault! how I'm the problem!" _

Lynn Grumbled, "He was just being a wuss," Lynn told herself

She threw the ball harder and she caught it the same, she threw it back as Lincoln's words began to repeat themselves.

_ "you never look at yourself and see how much of a bitch you can be!?" _

"I'm not a bitch," She told herself

She threw the ball harder

_ "NO! Because all that goes through your thick skull is how great and amazing you are!"   
_

"Stop it" Lynn told her brain "he's just trying to hurt me"

She threw it harder than before

_ "of course that's what you think..." _

"I-I know I'm right," She said

She threw the ball harder now, you could hear the pounding through the whole house.

_ "It's always me... never you," _

She threw the ball harder and it came back even faster and hit her right in the face. Lynn grunted in pain as she looked to where the ball landed

"Son of a bitch!" Lynn cried

She left her room and went to the bathroom to look at her face, it wasn't bad but it was gonna leave a bruise on the corner of her left eye. She sighed and was just glad that she didn't break her nose... again. She walked out and went back to her room. This time there was no ball throwing and she just lied on her bed and looked to the ceiling. Now, and only now, had Lynn Loud Jr. began to truly think about her faults, about how she acted, about how her actions had affected the people around her. She remembered a lot of bad things that she had done to each of her siblings, not to mention there were somethings that even she kinda hated about herself, like clogging up the toilet, While Lynn wasn't the definition of "girly" There were somethings that even she thought were gross. She just never wanted to be like her other siblings, she never wanted to worry about her features or dating people, or anything that Teenage movies and shows depicted girls worrying about.

She always thought that was useless. So when Lynn finally got a baby brother, she was happy, because then she had someone who she could relate to. That's why she played sports with him because she always thought that's what boys liked, that's what she liked after all, and most called her a tom-boy.

But Lincoln was different, He wasn't like most boys that Lynn knew or played with, no, Lincoln was totally the opposite of them.

Lynn had guessed that this was why she treated him harshly sometimes, because despite him loving all of his sisters, he spent little time with him, and she hated that, she always assumed that he hated her for who she was and how she acted, so that's why she treated him harshly, bullied him. Hell, she remembered how she made Lincoln come to her baseball game once, she had to use a bat just to get him-

Oh

_**OH!** _

Lynn now knew what Lincoln saw in her. Not once, not even after the "Bad Luck" event had she told the family the true side of her story. She had threatened Lincoln. With a bat.

"shit!" She said

she sat up and turned around to punch her pillow, she needed something to punch. She now saw how in the wrong she truly was, not once had she fessed up to her action, nor had she even apologized to Lincoln. She was never one to apologize to anyone, only when she was wrong would she apologize, but she had been in the wrong for so long, and never once... had she admitted to it.

Lynn Loud now accepted and embraced the truth.

She was a terrible sister.

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Meanwhile, Lori was walking around at 7:00 and it was already dark to where they could see the stars in the sky, and the sidewalks were lit up by the street lamps. Although she was going very slowly, though, no one would notice, to others it just looked like she was taking her time, but the real reason was that she had taken another of Luan's pills. Yep. This was Lori's escape from all the stress and turmoil that she was going through. She just needed anything to have the pain be gone. However, she was also slowly coming own from her little high and she was a bit pissed off at this. She hated feeling reality again, it made her feel cold and it left her itching for more. Lori was gonna sneak behind a bush so she could another pill before heading home, but then she spotted the last person she was actually expecting to see on her small walk, she saw him and he saw her and both stopped.

"Lincoln" Lori said

"Lori" Lincoln replied

There was silence, but Lori wanted to talk to him. She needed to talk to him. She needed to know what was so wrong with her that he had to go and live with her best friend. It felt so weird not having him around, and she had missed him.

"Lincoln could we talk?" Lori asked

"about what?" Lincoln asked

"I-I need to know..." she began before swallowing and sighing, "I Need to Know what's wrong with me," She told him.

"what?" Lincoln asked

"I need to know what you see that is wrong with me" Lori repeated herself

"A-Are you fucking serious Lori!?" Lincoln asked her

"Lincoln Please! I-I need to know!" Lori cried

"Lori I can't help you do that! If I do all you'll do is ignore it, not believe it's true! You need to figure out that for yourself!" Lincoln cried

Lori growled, "Why can't you help me!?" Lori cried

"Because I can't!" Lincoln cried "I can't help you! No one can help you figure yourself out, Lori! The only person that can, is you"

"What the hell is that even suppose to mean!? How can I help myself if others can't even give me some hints!" Lori cried

"Lori there are somethings that people can't help you with!" Lincoln said "This is why I hate you so much!"

Lori was shocked and hurt as his words, she had already heard him say those words to her before and they stung, but now, now they nearly broke her heart. It hurt so much. "H-How can you say that?" Lori asked

"because you're a bully!" Lincoln cried

"How am I a bully!?" Lori cried

"Because y-you bully me into feelings t-that I don't want to feel! I hate these feelings!" Lincoln cried "I'm sad and angry and confused a-and... I don't know!" Lincoln cried as tears fell from his eyes.

"If I hurt you so bad then why do you keep on forgiving me!?" Lori cried as tears fell from her face as well

"I DON'T KNOW!" Lincoln cried "I don't know why I keep forgiving you! I shouldn't but I do"

Lori didn't know how to respond, it hurt her too much to look at her brother without feeling guilty. To know that she had caused so much pain on her brother and knowing that he hated her had crushed her. She had no boyfriend, no friends, most of her family hated her, and her brother hated her. She had nothing. Lori ran off and didn't look back. Tears fell from her life as she now knew she had nothing.

Lincoln was still processing everything and only realized that Lori was gone as she turned a corner, Lincoln snapped out of his daze and ran after her, but as soon as he reached the corner he couldn't see her anymore, he ran in the direction of his home and guessed that was where she was going. After 5 minutes he stopped when he saw a figure sitting on a bus bench just two miles away from his house. It was Lori. Lincoln ran up to the street and saw that she was staring up at the sky. Lincoln calmed himself down and decided that he needed to tell her, maybe, and hopefully, he could help her.

"Lori" Lincoln said as he approached

"Yeah?" She mumbled

Lincoln now took a seat next to her on the bench and looked up to the sky with her, he decided to start off the conversation

"I-I wanted to say I'm sorry... and that I love you, I-I'm just so angry because... because of everything, and because I feel like you guys don't care about me," Lincoln told her

There was no answer from her, so Lincoln continued to talk, he looked to the sky and saw how bright the stars were tonight, one of the many perks of living in a small town.

"The stars look amazing tonight, huh Lori?" He asked

No response

"Lori?" Lincoln asked

Lincoln scooted closer to her and tapped her on the arm when that didn't get her attention, Lincoln lightly nudged her and she slowly fell on his right side, but something from her hand fell and landed on the seat of the bench.

It was a pill bottle.

Luan's Xanax pill bottle.

Lincoln's eyes widened in fear as the gravity of the situation hit him. Lori had been taking pills for god knows how long, now... now she had overdosed.

"Lori! Lori! Hey, come on! Wake up!" Lincoln cried as he shook her "wake up! Wake up! Come one wake up!" Lincoln pleaded as he shook her

Lincoln quickly, grabbed his phone and dialed 911. As it called, tears fell from Lincoln's eyes as he looked to Lori. he wasn't too late, he couldn't have been, he had arrived just in time right!?

...Right?

All Lincoln could hear was a single thought that rang through his head

_'This is all y fault...'_

* * *

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**"Life hurts a lot more than death" - Jim Morrison**


	17. Shit Happens

Lori was in the hospital. Luckily she had survived somehow, and the doctors were able to pump her stomach in time, however, now she was in a comatose state but the doctor said that she would wake up at any moment. The Loud Family along with Bobby and Ronnie Anne were all waiting outside the room. No one wanted to leave, scared of what might happen if they left, they all wanted to be there, well all except one.

Currently Lincoln was outside of the hospital smoking, knowing that your sister overdose was a hard pill to swallow, but what's even harder to know is that she did it because of you.

Lincoln blamed himself, he had almost thought that she was dead. Lincolns heart couldn't handle the pain knowing that he would be the cause of Lori's death, it pained him to know that he was basically responsible for her near-death. He just couldn't take the pain, so he tried to numb it away, he had found one of the doctors had a pack of cigarettes and took four from the pack. Lincoln still had his lighter on him and so he put one in his mouth and lit the cigarette.

Of course, as soon as he had taken a puff it had hurt his throat a little, due to him not smoking for quite some time, but after a while, the numbing sensation that would cool and ease his mind and body returned. He just sat there, smoking. He was afraid to go inside because he knew or felt that his Family would blame him for what happened.

He didn't blame them of course, he blamed himself and if they blamed him to, then he would agree.

Lincoln just felt like a piece of shit anyways.

Suddenly, Lincoln felt his phone vibrate, he quickly took it out of his pocket and saw who it was. It was Backy calling. Lincoln answered the phone and put it to his ear.

 **[Lincoln! Thank God! Look, I heard what happened from Leni, we're on our way!]** Becky told him

"Wait? whos with you?" Lincoln asked

 **[Tabby, I thought it would be best to tell her what's going on since you told me she's just as involved]** Becky told him

Lincoln Nodded, "ok, thanks, I'll see you when you get here," He told them

 **[Alright, Bye]** Becky said

Both hung up the phone and Lincoln resumed smoking. Right now, he just wanted not to shake in fear or sadness. However, when Lincoln raised his hand to take a hit from the cigarette, his hand shook slightly. Lincoln's own mind and body still held the fear that he once had in him. Lincoln was scared, scared that he was the cause of his sisters near-death, scared that everyone and everything would turn on him in a split second if he showed his face to his family.

But most of all... He was scared of being alone.

* * *

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The Loud Family returned home and Lynn looked around at her family and saw that indeed everyone was taking in the news a different way, Both Bobby and Ronnie Anne left to alk around Royal Woods and try to take their minds off of everything. Luan and Luna went into their rooms, while the twins went back to their rooms as well to play to take their mind off of things, Lily was asleep and Lisa was somewhere, Lucy went for a walk, and Leni went to her room. Lynn decided it was time, not the best of course, but still, it was time to come clean.

She went to Luna's room and opened it, seeing the rocker just lying on her bed while the comedian was also doing nothing, but when Lynn entered, the two looked to her.

"I wanna call a sister meeting so everyone meets in Leni's room," Lynn said "tell the others"

Lynn then closed the door and headed for Leni's room. When she entered, Leni was cleaning off her makeup, because she was crying, crying then most everyone, because out of everyone, Leni relied on two people in her life to comfort her. Lincoln and Lori.

And neither of the two were here.

Leni looked up as she heard Lynn enter and she wiped the still falling tears away.

"Need something Lynn?" Leni asked

"we're having a sister meeting, there's something I wanna tell everyone," Lynn said

"what is it?" Leni asked through her saddened voice

"I think we should wait till everyone gets here" Lynn replied

Leni nodded and the two waited, after a few minutes, most of the sisters entered the room, all except for Lucy, who was still on her walk. Each sister took a seat as Lynn decided to step in front of everyone, she steeled her nerves, ready to come clean and admit how most of the events, Lincoln's depression, The bad Luck situation, was all her fault.

"Why did you call all of us here Lynn?" Lola asked

Everyone else nodded in agreement and it was time, time to come clean about everything. So Lynn took in a deep breath in and then out as she looked all of her sisters in the eye.

"I Threatened Lincoln to go to my game! With My bat!" Lynn told them loudly

There was a Loud slap before anyone reply or do anything. Leni had hit Lynn and knocked her younger sister to the ground... Things only escalated from there.

* * *

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Lincoln was in his room at Becky's house and he just sat on his bed. He then opened the window and pulled out one of the other three cigarettes, he put it to his mouth and lit it with his Zippo. still had two cigarettes left, he smoked ad he began to feel a little better, However, there was a knock on the door and before he could reply, in walked both Becky and Tabby. Both looked at Lincoln with worry as he sat and smoked. Tabby walked and sat on his right and looked at him, while Becky stood by the door, watching and making sure everything was gonna be ok.

"Lincoln... tell me what's wrong, please," She asked him

Lincoln looked to her, he felt awful seeing her so worried about him and tears actually formed in his eyes as he began to finally talk to her

"It's all my fault," Lincoln told her

"The situation with Lori?" Tabby asked

Lincoln nodded, "Not just that, but everything, every bad thing that's ever happened is my fault"

"Do you really believe that?" Tabby asked

Lincoln shrugged, "I don't know, I know it's a lie, something I've been telling myself for a while now"

Becky approached and kneeled down next to him and tears were present in her eyes as she looked to Lincoln

"Why do you think that? Why do you think you've been lying to yourself?" Becky asked

"I don't know, But I just can't accept that it's not my fault, it is! Lori's in the hospital because of me!" Lincoln cried, tears falling from his face

Tabby had tears fall slowly from her face as she grabbed his hand. Lincoln looked at her and saw how saddened she had become.

"You need to forgive yourself," Tabby told him through tears

More tears fell from his face as he heard her, "I can't...I don't know how to... I don't even know where to begin" Lincoln cried "God why does shit like this happen!?" Lincoln cried

He fell onto Tabby's chest as he let out all his sadness that he's been feeling, and Tabby was there to comfort him as was Becky, all three were crying.

"It's ok, Linc, it's ok, Shit like this just happens Linc" Tabby told him in a soft voice "Shit Happens..." She finished


	18. Resolved

It was time for the Santiago Siblings to leave. It's been three days since Lori had woken up from her comatose state, but she wasn't really wanting to talk to Bobby, and Bobby himself didn't really wanna leave Lori in her time of need, but he had to, the world didn't stop turning after all, but he at least hoped that when Lori left the hospital they could talk this out.

However, the siblings weren't leaving till later that day, so before they could, Ronnie Anne went for a walk so she could clear her head. She walked away from the loud house and proceeded to head to the park, it was the only place in town where she could actually think. On her way there she had passed a few of the people, she used to see when she was at Royal Woods elementary. She then began to think fondly of her time in the small town, how she grew up here, and every one of those silly adventures she had in the town.

She walked until she had finally made it to the park, she walked along the trail until finally decided to just sit down on a nearby bench. It was odd since it was the same place She had confessed to Lincoln, and the same place she was rejected by him.

Truth be told, it still hurt her being rejected like that. However, with the help of Lincolns Girlfriend, Tabby, Ronnie Anne had figured out how and why she had ruined her and Lincoln's relationship. Still being back at the same place sucked and was indeed like one of those movie scenes where the girl was all alone and then the guy would show up and they'd rekindle their love or some bullshit.

"I fucking hate Cliche's," Ronnie told herself

"So do I" came a voice

Ronnie Anne was startled but then turned to her right, where she saw the last person she had actually expected to see.

Lincoln Loud.

Lincoln sat down on the same bench as her, and he took a breath in and let out a sigh, He pulled out a Cigarette and his Zippo lighter. He put the cigarette in his mouth before lighting it. He closed the Zippo lighter and put it away Taking a long huff of it, he then moved the cigarette away from his mouth and let out a cloud of smoke.

"What are you doing here?" She asked

"Came here to think" Lincon replied "You?"

"Same" Ronnie replied

Once again, a moment of silence took over, neither said a word as Lincoln continued to smoke his cigarette. Ronnie Anne contemplated on what to say next, however, she wanted to ask him f they were ok or if things were gonna be like this every time they talked, but since she was never one for that mushy love shit, she decided to at least try to break the silence with a bit of humor.

"So... is this the part where we talk about how much we love each other, kiss and then walk off into the sunset as the credits roll?" Ronnie Anne asked with a smirk

Lincoln chuckled, "I'm sure that's what most would think would happen, but this isn't one of those stories," Lincoln said "not to mention I'm sure Tabby would bust my mouth open if I cheated on her"

Both chuckled before it died down again. Ronnie Anne looked back at him and decided she wasn't going to be afraid to talk about her feelings. After all, being afraid is what got her in this mess.

"I'm leaving today," Ronnie told him

Lincoln looked to her as she told him this and Ronnie could've sworn she had seen a bit of sadness in his eyes. Lincoln let out a breath of smoke as he looked at her.

"I'm sorry" He replied

"Sorry for what?" Ronnie asked

"Sorry for this whole fucking messed I've cause"

"Linc you-"

"I know I don't need to be, but it's just something I had to say," Lincoln told her "I blame myself for everything that's happened recently, my family, Lori, you... everything"

"Don't" Ronnie Anne told him "If anyone needs to be sorry it's us, we've all made stupid mistakes, Me, Lori, My Brother, everyone"

Lincoln chuckled, and Ronnie Anne looked at him with confusion

"What?" Ronnie asked

"Sorry, it's just that I remember, you were always stubborn to admit you were wrong" Lincoln chuckled

Ronnie Anne could've chewed him out about how she was being serious but what good would that do, instead, she smiled, because she had come to terms with her mistakes and flaws, and was fine laughed at her past self "Well, your girlfriend was the one who told me not to be afraid of who I really was any more" Ronnie told him

Now, Ronnie Anne was ready to deal with the huge issue, or at least the unresolved problem that they both had, and hopefully, they could fix

"Hey, Linc?"

"Yeah?"

"Is it possible for us to still be friends?" She asked

Lincoln took another huff of his cigarette and this time, slowly let it out of his mouth, "that's a dumb question, of course we can" Lincoln told her

Ronnie Anne was both relieved and a bit confused, "but why?" She asked

Lincoln sighed, "It's like you said we all make mistakes, some of which do cause problems, but you asked Tabby why I chose her and she gave you an answer, and you being here, asking me if it's possible to fix our friendship, it's proof that you are doing better," Lincoln told her

Ronnie Anne nodded, "So do you forgive me?" She asked

"Yes and No" Lincoln said "the pain is still there, but we can try and fix it, and as long as we try, that's all that matters, because eventually and hopefully, we can go back to what we once were," Lincoln told her

Ronnie smiled, she could feel a bit of tears welling up in her eyes but she wiped them away, and looked to him, "sounds good" she told him, "I'm glad we can still try and work things out"

Lincoln softly smile "So am I" Lincoln replied

Lincoln then got up from the bench and put the cigarette in the ashtray above the trashcan across from the bench and looked back to her

"That was hopefully the last cigarette I'd ever smoke," Lincoln said "I'll talk to you later Ronnie Anne, I got something I need to do," He told her as he walked away

Ronnie Anne watched as he walked off and smiled "Talk to you later Lame-O" Ronnie Anne said as she stayed on the bench for a few more minutes before leaving.

* * *

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Lincoln arrived at the hospital and he asked to see his oldest sister. Despite not seeing her since she woke up, Lincoln didn't really feel like it was the time for them to have a talk. Now though... With Bobby and Ronnie leaving, now was the time to talk.

Lincoln entered the room of Lori, we were currently sitting up in her cot and watching the TV that hung from the ceiling. When Lori heard her door open, she turned to look at her little brother. When she finally saw him, she turned off the TV and Lincoln sat on one of the chairs next to her. There were no words for the first few minutes. Lincoln just sat next to Lori and Lori just sat in silence.

Lori herself didn't want to be seen this way in front of Lincoln and in front of Bobby. It just reminded her of her mistake of trying to take her own life. It was a stupid decision but she did it. And when she saw the smiles and look of relief when she woke up and her family had raced over to see her, she could not handle it and she didn't want to see Bobby with the same look, because it just reminded her how stupid she was for even trying something like taking her own life.

"Why are you here?" Lori asked

Lincoln looked at her and smiled, "I'm here because I wanted to tell you how you could change" Lincoln told him

Lori was both shocked and confused, she had asked both Becky and Lincoln himself how she could change, however, both had said that she needed to figure it out on her own, but now... now Lincoln was going to just tell her how she can change. To her, it made no sense and wanted to ask why, but she wasn't going to give up on an opportunity to learn how she could finally better herself

"How?" She asked

Lincoln looked at her, "stop" He replied

"Stop?" She asked, "What do you mean stop?"

"Stop being afraid that we won't need you, Stop being overdramatic, stop trying to control everything because you feel like you need to," Lincoln told her "You put to much pressure on yourself, yet when we try to ease your burden you freak out, Remember how I helped Leni try to get her drivers License? you sabotaged her so that we would still need you to drive us places and I'm also sure that each one of our siblings could tell you when you overreacted to things because you weren't in control"

Lori looked at him and realized that it was indeed the truth, that those stories were true, how she never realized it was beyond her. However, that didn't answer a question Lori now had.

"What if I can't change?" Lori asked, "What if... what if I don't wanna change?"

Lincoln sighed, "then what I had really been afraid of is true... You don't give a shit about us" Lincoln told her "Change Lori, It doesn't matter for who, Do it for us, do it for Bobby, or just do it for yourself... Just Change Lori" Lincoln told her

With that revelation and with those somewhat harsh words, Lincoln got up from his seat and left the room, Leaving Lori to ponder his words and ask herself if she could change for herself as well as everyone else. However, she would have to try to be better.

* * *

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At Becky's house, she along with her aunt and uncle were helping Lincoln gather his things. Becky looked at Lincoln as he was getting the last of his clothes.

"Are you sure about this?" She asked, "are you sure they'll be better?"

Lincoln looked to her, "I know they will" Lincoln told her "And with everything that's happen, I think we'll need each other more than ever"

"I hope your right Lincoln" Becky said

When Becky had heard that Lincoln wanted to go back home she was skeptical, because of everything that has happened, she knew that Lincoln wasn't ready to go back home. In fact, she knew that he was putting his own mental health at risk just to bring his family together again.

She knew what kind of person Lincoln was and was indeed someone who would put off his own happiness and health just to make sure everyone else was ok. Becky admired that about him, but it wasn't someone at his age should have.

Despite the fact that he said he was ok and that he was going to take it easy. She knew that Lincoln still thought he needed to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. She used to think the same way, but for some reason, while she worried about Lincoln, she also knew he wasn't going to completely not worry about himself. Lincoln knew himself and knew when he needed to talk to someone, like his friend Clyde or Tabby.

She just worried about him because she had cared for and loved him like he was her brother. In the time they spent together, she had come to love him just like she had her brother. And told him that if he ever needed to talk and didn't feel like he could talk to Tabby or Clyde he could come and talk to her, and he said he would.

Finally, everything was packed and he turned to Becky who looked back to him. She hugged him and he hugged back. The broke the hug and the once again looked at each other.

"Thank you... for everything" Lincoln told her

She smiled and felt a tear form in her eye, "It's no problem Lincoln, I'll always help out if you need it" She told him "See you around Linc" Becky said

Lincoln smiled and sniffled a little, "See you around Becky" Lincoln replied

Lincoln got into the car with Becky's uncle and they drove him back home. Becky watched as they drove off and she smiled as she wiped the tear away.

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**We have one more chapter left before the story ends**


	19. Wake me up when September Ends...

_"tonight, the town of Royal woods mourns the loss of a very special person to the community"_

_"A young woman, who worked for Child protective services and a patron to organizations who helped abused kids, was in Royal woods was tragically killed tonight by one angry father"_

_"Tragedy strikes in the small town of Royal woods as the local speaker against child abuse was killed tonight"_

* * *

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Lincoln Loud, now at the age of 23, had arrived back at Royal Woods just yesterday. He was currently in his fiancee's parent's home sleeping with her in their own bed, snuggled together within a large dark purple blanket, was Lincoln and Tabby.

Tabby slowly began to stir and her eyes opened only to be greeted with the faint light of the sun shining through her blinds. she got up and she turned her head to her fiance and indeed saw hi still sleeping, she got out of bed, wearing a pair of lincoln's shorts that she "borrowed" and a black sabbath shirt. She grabbed a pair of clothes and went to the bathroom to use it before taking a shower and changing before waking up Lincoln. She had finished her shower and was now drying herself off, her hair was much shorter then it was years ago, it was now a pixie cut and her pink tips were gone so her hair was now completely black, she now wore a pair of lip earrings in honor of Smooch. She put on a pair of tight black jeans and then a white and black striped long-sleeved shirt before putting a black vest over it. She then left the bathroom and headed back to the room but then saw her mother coming out of her own room

"Hey sweetie" Tabby's mother, Rachel, said

"Hey mum" Tabby replied

"going to wake up Lincoln?" Rachel asked

"Yeah, he wanted to visit his family and whoever else was around before heading over there" Tabby replied with a sigh "I just don't know how he's going to act once we get there..."

Rachel walked to her daughter and put her hands on her daughter's shoulder, causing her daughter to look at her mother before being pulled into a hug. Tabby then returned the hug and then they broke the hug

"I'm sure everything will be fine, just be there for him," Rachel told Tabby

Tabby softly smiled and nodded, "Right," She said

Rachel smiled back, "well go wake up Lincoln, breakfast is almost ready, your fathers cooking eggs and sausage for breakfast"

Tabby nodded and Rachel then headed to the kitchen while Tabby went back into her room, still seeing Lincoln asleep on her old bed, the approached the bed and shook him lightly, knowing that would at least wake him a little

"Hey Linc, come on love, it's time to get up," She said softly

Lincoln groaned a little and then pushed rolled on to his back and got up, rubbing his eyes as the same light now shined in his eyes, he looked to his fiancee and gave her a sleepy half-smile

"morning" He greeted

"Mornin" Tabby greeted back with a smile "get dressed and come down for breakfast, then we can head over to your parent's house and visit"

Lincoln nodded and got off the bed and went grab a new pair of clothing before leaving for the bathroom while Tabby headed to the kitchen.

She walked down the hall and saw some of the childhood photos her parents had some were new, like the picture of Lincoln and her taking pictures for their wedding invitations. she remembered smiling that whole day, they had taken a lot of photos and gave some to family and even some friends. One that she gave to her mother was a picture of the two smiling, while Lincoln carried her bridal style and she was laughing, she really was laughing too. As she remembered how giddy it had made her feel, she turned away from the photo and continued her way to the kitchen.

Once there, she saw her dad dressed in his business clothes, as he had just finished putting the last plate on the table, he then turned to put the pans in the dishwasher only to see his daughter. Tabby's father, William, smiled at his daughter while grabbing the pans and placing them in the dishwasher.

"hello Rockstar" William greeted his daughter

"Hey Dad" Tabby greeted back

Her mom was already eating at the table and was close to being done. Tabby sat down at the table and grabbed the plate right in front of her seat and started to eat. Tabby's dad finished cleaning whatever mess he made while he had cooked and then looked to his phone.

"Good, I can still make it," He told himself

"workin today dad?" Tabby asked

"Yep," He said "sending me to Utah again, I should only be there for a week though, so that's good, I might even be home to see you and Lincoln off," William told his daughter

"Be safe dear" Rachel told her husband "And don't lose your wallet this time too"

William rolled his eyes with a simile, "that happened once, but I won't" He said "Bye honey, By Tabby, and don't forget to tell Lincoln I said bye" he then left the house.

"bye love you" Tabby and her mother said simultaneously

a minute later, Lincoln entered the kitchen and saw the two women eating breakfast, he looked around before heading for his seat.

"your dad leave for work, Tabby?" Lincoln asked

"he did, went to Utah this time" Tabby replied

Lincoln nodded and began to eat with the family. Tabby looked at him and while she did her expression saddened a little bit. he had only come back once he had heard what had happened and to see Lincoln break down like that, it was the toughest thing for her to see again. It reminded her of all those years ago when she had Lincoln first started dating, thankfully though he wasn't alone this time, tabby comforted him that entire day.

Tabby's mother finished eating and put her plate and fork in the dishwasher and left the kitchen and went to the living room, Tabby looked to Lincoln as he ate the last of his eggs before going for his sausage.

"Hey love" Tabby called

"yeah, Tabby?"

"Are you sure you wanna do this today? are you ready for it?" Tabby asked

Lincoln looked at her and he put his for down and sighed, "I've been asking that same thing ever since I wanted to come here, and to be honest, if I don't do it now, I might never do it, it's bad enough we couldn't attend it" Lincoln told her "But yeah... I'm sure I wanna do this"

Tabby softly smiled and nodded, "alright, and I'll be with you every step of the way," She told him

"I know Tabs," He told her with a soft smile "I know"

After their conversation, they put their dishes away told Rachel that they were leaving and she hugged them both but gave Lincoln a tighter hug. Rachel knew how hard today might be for the Loud boy and she hoped that everything would be ok. The two left the house and headed for their car, which was a black 1971 El Camino with purple stripes on the hood and the on the trunk. They drove for 20 minutes before Tabby and Lincoln had finally arrived at the Loud House. Not a lot seemed to change in the past 12 years, the house looked pretty much the same. They got out of their car and walked up the driveway, got out of the car, and went up the steps to the front door. Lincoln rang the doorbell and waited for a moment. The door opened and a 13-year-old Lily stood at the doorway and once her eyes landed on her brother, she quickly crashed into him with a tight hug

"Lincy!" Lily cried out

Lincoln was taken aback for a while but hugged back with a smile, "Hey Lily, good to see you"

Lily broke the hug and looked to Tabby and hugged her tightly as well, Tabby giggled and hugged back, "Hey there pipsqueak" Tabby smiled "good to see you again"

Lily then broke the hug and looked at the two with wide eyes and a bright smile, "I can't believe you're getting married!" Lily cried "can I be the flower girl!? can I!? Can I!? Can I!?" Lily pleaded

Tabby chuckled, "we'll think about it Lily" Tabby said with a smile

"Lily, where's mom and dad?" Lincoln asked

"They went to the store to pick up some more food" Lily repeated

"Hey, Lily, who's there?" Came a voice

The three looked up to see Lynn Loud with Lana and Lola behind her. Lynn looked at her broth and smiled before running down the stairs and going for a hug, Lincoln held his arms out and the two siblings hugged.

"It's good to see you Linc" Lynn said with joy "feels like it's been years!"

Lincoln chuckled, "it has been Lynn, three years since we last saw each other in person," Lincoln said, "Are Lori, Leni, Luna, and Luan here too?" Lincoln asked

Lynn nodded, "yeah, Bobby and Ronnie are here too along with Benny and Sam, we all came down here since we heard you'd be coming down for the week, and since it's been a while, we thought it was a good time to visit," Lynn told her brother

Lincoln smiled as Lynn called everyone downstairs, letting everyone know he was there. Lincoln could hear the rumbling of many feet on the second story of the house and he could see a large group of people come down the stairs. They all hugged Lincoln and Tabby and the family began to chat like old times.

* * *

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Currently, Lincoln was sitting on the front steps as he was watching Tabby play with Lily as well as Loan, Lori, and Bobby's kid. The front door open and he turned to see Lynn, she looked at him before sitting next to him

"Still can't believe you're getting married before me," Lynn told him

Lincoln smiled, "I'll admit, I was still surprised she said yes," Lincoln told his sister "but every time I remember that she did, I smile, it was one of the best moments in my life"

Lynn nodded and looked to her brother, "How are you holding up?" Lynn asked

Lincoln looked at her and then to the ground, he fidgeted with his hands before sighing and he ruffled ith his hair a little, "Not good, but I'm trying to stay strong for her" Lincoln told Lynn

Lynn looked at him with worry, before looking back at Lily and Loan running around. It's been a long time since she and Lincoln had actually talked about some deep stuff that was on their mind. The last time they talked like this was a week after Lincoln returned home from Becky's house

"You know what this reminds me of?" She asked

"What?" Lincoln asked

"That day" Lynn told him

Instantly, Lincoln knew what she was talking about and he thought back on that day...

* * *

** Flashback **

_Lincoln had arrived home after spending some time with the guys, he entered the house only to find Lynn sitting on the couch looking down. Lincoln closed the door behind him and looked at Lynn_

_"Hey Lynn" He greeted_

_"Hey Linc" She greeted back, sound almost robotic_

_Lincoln took a seat next to her on the couch. Neither said a word as a few commercials played on the tv. Lincoln looked to Lynn and could see that she hadn't looked the same since he got back, it was understandable with everything that had recently happened. The Family was desperately trying to regain the happy lives they once had, but that would take some time. However, Lynn had been looking the worst, she had bags under her eyes and she hadn't even played any sports since he returned, she just stayed in her room and didn't talk to almost anyone. It worried him._

_"Lynn?"_

_"Sup?"_

_"Are you ok?"_

_After his question, Lynn froze a little but quickly returned to her gloomy demeanor as she kept staring at the tv. "I'm fine Linc," She told him_

_"I don't think you are, you've been acting weird ever since I got back," Lincoln told her "are you mad at me or something?" he asked_

_Lyn quickly turned her head to her brother, "No!" she cried in worry_

_Lincoln was taken aback by her sudden mood change. Lynn now faced him completely before looking away_

_"I'm sorry I've been acting strange it just..." Lynn began_

_"Just what?" Lincoln asked_

_Lynn looked at him with worry and fear on her face, "Do you hate me?" she asked_

_Lincoln looked a little stunned but he knew something like this might have come up. After all, he still wasn't socializing with most of his sisters since everything was pretty much on the rocks. However, it didn't mean Lincoln hated them, but he could see why Lynn had thought that he hated her. She was indeed one of the main reasons he left and she knew that._

_Lincoln sighed before taking Lynn's hand, it startled her and she looked at him as did he_

_"Lynn I don't hate you," Lincoln told her_

_"But-!"_

_"I know you might think that I know all of my sisters might think that, but the truth is your my sisters and I will love you guys with all my heart, I can't promise that things will be the same anymore, but know that no matter what, I will love you, as well as everyone else," Lincoln told her_

_Lynn looked at him with shock, "But I... I... I treated you like shit! H-How can you forgive me?" She asked, tears beginning to form in her eyes_

_Lincoln shook his head, "I haven't" he told her_

_Lynn was now more confused, "I-I-I don't understand..." Lynn replied_

_"I know," Lincoln told her "Lynn... I can't forgive the things you and everyone did to me, I can't, but that doesn't mean I have to cling to it, Just because I don't hate you doesn't mean I can forgive you, again, I can't forgive those things, but I don't have to hate you for the things that happened in the past" Lincoln told her_

_"Then why come back?" Lynn asked_

_"I came back because I knew that it was time, being away, was just causing everyone pain, and I didn't want that," Lincoln told Lynn, "The important things I've seen since I came back as everyone's mood being picked up, everyone changing a little for me, and maybe even for themselves, and I saw them actually trying and most of I'll I'm seeing you trying Lynn"_

_"What do you mean?" Lynn asked "I've been sulking, I haven't apologized to you or anyone else and I-"_

_"But you are" Lincoln cut her off "Lynn, you may not have said it, but you've been showing it, I see you try and do things for everyone, not because there's something in it for you but because it's how you apologize"_

_Lynn was a little amazed that he could tell that. Lynn was never one for being mushy and feely, but her actions always spoke louder, and Lincoln saw this. Over the week she had been doing more things for everyone and she hasn't even tried doing anything that was seen as a sport or she could turn into a competition._

_"Lynn I don't hate you," Lincoln told her "I love you"_

_Lincoln pulled her into a hug and Lynn was still a bit shocked but after a few minutes she returned the hug_

_"I'll be there for you as long as you try not to overreact and be honest with yourself and with me," Lincoln told her_

_"I will," Lynn told her brother "I promise not to overreact anymore and as long as your honest with me too, I will be with you," Lynn told him_

_"Deal," Lincoln told her_

* * *

Lincoln smiled as the memory ended and he looked back to Lynn, "and you did try, and it worked, you've been open with me and the others and even stopped overreacting with everyone else to, I can't tell you how many ties you changing has saved both our asses" Lincoln finished with a chuckle

Lynn chuckled too, "tell me about it, remember that time Luna and Luan thought you had cheated on tabby?" Lynn asked

Lincoln nodded, "yeah I remember," Lincoln said "How did they assume I cheated on her when I was just practicing with Haiku for a play?" he asked

"They only focused on the words "love you" and "behind their back" when you were reading that script," Lynn told him "I swear I was so glad that I heard the whole to thing and was before they overreacted"

Lincoln nodded, he then felt his phone buzz and he took it out to see that it was time for him to get going for the day, "I gotta get going... it's time" Lincoln told her

"Are you sure you don't want us to come with you two?" Lynn asked

"We'll be fine," Lincoln told her reassuringly "We'll come back for dinner before we head back to Tabby's place"

Lynn looked at him and nodded, "alright, but remember, we'll be here for you Linc" Lynn told her brother

Lincoln nodded with a soft smile, "I know"

Lincoln told Tabby that it was time to go and she told the two little girls that she would be back soon to play more. Tabby and Lincoln got in the car and headed off to their destination.

.

.

.

.

Now, it was still midday, and Lincoln and tabby had driven uphill and were now on a small mountain range overlooking the town. they stopped the car and got out, Lincoln grabbed a rose as did Tabby, then looking around they found what they were looking for. They watched where they stepped as they passed the many stones that held the names of the dearly departed. Finally, they were at the stone that held a very close friends name

"Hey, Becky... it's been a while" He said "I'm sorry we couldn't make it to your funeral"

They stood in front of the gravestone of their friend Becky. A person who had changed Lincoln's life.

**Becky Anderson**

**June 19th, 1990 - September 31st, 2020**

**beloved niece, wife, and friend to all**

"Lincoln and I are getting married soon and we're both doing great," Tabby told the gravestone "we wished you could be here with us."

"We miss you a lot Becky," Lincoln said

Tears formed in both pairs of eyes as they set the roses on the ground in front of the grave.

"We know you're in a better place, and we hope that you're looking down on us and smiling," Lincoln said as the tears fell "Love you, Becky"

Tabby wiped the tears from her eyes and sniffled before she looked to Lincoln and held his hand and he did the same.

"I never got the chance to actually thank you for everything you did for me, I owed you, and now... now I don't know how I can repay you," Lincoln said, his tone changing

"Linc's a comic book artist now, really famous now too, should have seen him when he won his first award for the best graphic novel of the year, he was in tears" Tabby giggled with tears rolling down her cheeks "I've been working at my own guitar shop and I've been singing on the internet too, lot of people like it"

They said goodbye once more and promised they would visit again at some point. They went back to the car and Tabby started it up and they turned the car around and drove off, Lincoln looked back at the grave from his mirror. as the grave got farther and farther he was still saddened but he felt relief that he at least got to visit her, and he was sure to visit her every time they were in Royal woods.

In a way, things turned out good for him, despite his current loss, he knew that she wanted him to be strong for her, and to carry on. Lincoln would do so, for Becky, for his family, for his fiancee, and for himself.

* * *

** The End **


End file.
